Last Updated: November 14, 2024
“Do You Want A Love, Crazy Experience From An ‘Over The Hill’ Old Buzzard?”
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She maybe ‘long in the tooth,’ but still know how to get around and what she wants. It’s no surprise to me that most folks know someone like this; a neighbor, close friend, the janitor’s wife; etc, (How could someone like this ever be forgotten)?
Regardless if it’s a cafeteria worker at your old high school, a waitress at the old coffee shop that you and your friends used to frequent in college, or an old next-door neighbor that always had the hots for you, this type of woman will appear somewhere in your life.
‘Loves Her Cigarettes…’
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To all the guys out there (of course this could be addressed to the ladies as well) when it comes down to loving someone like Dirty ol’ Doris, then my friend, you’ve hit the bottom of the barrel.
Also, you better get use to inhaling a lot of choking, cigarette smoke when in her presence and the smell on your clothes. Don’t complain! That’s BS to Doris! She’ll tell you in a minute to “kiss her ass.” (You better get used to her smelly clothes).
If you don’t mind the age difference and a woman who loves lots of sex (she’s 88) then this old bird might just be for you.
She’s a heavy smoker, so you better get use to it, or start smoking with her (that’s probably why she was born under the sign of cancer).
Just remember Not to smoke more than her! She’s a ‘three packer a day’ and will get ‘pissed’ if you try out doing her. (At least, she don’t smoke weed… she just ‘sell it.’) Ol’ Doris always wants to be the best at everything!
She was this way even at a young age. Growing up, when games were played among her friends, she would ‘kick their asses’ if she thought they were cheating. And that toughness carried on throughout the years!
‘She May Fart Dust, But…’
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“Hey! Don’t let her age fool you my friend.“ Ol’ Doris can still ‘throw down,’ even much better than others half her age.
Doris is an ‘Energizer Battery’ when it comes to sex! She can roll until the sun comes up!
Afterwards she’ll lay back, and have herself 7 or 8 smokes. Then It’s off to the races again. (So you better be ready)!
She’ll ‘screw your brains out’ and later suggest you take Viagra if you wanna go for several more rounds. It pisses Doris off knowing you can’t keep your ‘Love Muscle’ “standing at attention” very long. This old broad hates a ‘limp penis.‘
If you think you’re man enough, big & bad enough, lets see how you handle this. Get ready now to meet the hottest (at least in her mind), most active old buzzard on planet earth; that really knows how to live life & make serious love.
Hover your camera phone over QR code & open browser. Read Free sample preview…
Dirty Ol’ Doris
VITAL STATISTICS – Age: 88 and going up fast, Height: 5’2″ to 5’5″, Weight: Flirtatious.
OCCUPATION – This type will most likely be employed as a office manager of some broken down junk yard. You may also find this type running one of the largest distributors of pornographic materials and adult sex toys in the US, Canada, and the UK (but not necessarily in that order)!
FAVORITE FOODS – Once she puts her teeth in, she’s ready for chow. Dining out will consist of old cabbage plants with Caesar dressing. A side dish of Muskrat stew and boiled owl heads. For desert, she’ll have a slice of baboon pie topped with wild cherries.
FAVORITE DRINKS – Most mornings, especially after a long night of hot sex, she’ll gulp down two large glasses of prune juice to help with bowel movement.
The night life will consist of a fifth of Jack & coke, wine coolers and bloody Mary. Some Old Granddad bourbon would also be nice as well.
FAVORITE MUSIC – Ol’ Doris favorite sounds are the ringing of sales from her inner-city pornographic business (She says, “It’s a horny and freaky world out there and I’m looking to cash in”).
FAVORITE MOVIES/TV SHOWS – The ‘Golden Girls’ are on top of her list.
Also, it really fires her up when watching any amazing You tube xxx Adult videos such as; “Debbie Does Dallas,” “Naughty Girls from Central High,” “Don’t Do Me Wrong…Just Do Me.” & “Old Broads From The Home Giving Gum jobs”
(It’s ‘double duty’ night. A round of blowjobs while soaking their teeth at the same time).
FAVORITE SPORTS/HOBBIES – She wants to be a referee or judge at any event which includes young studs flexing their muscles. (She claims she’s the best at rubbing body oil.)
However, during football season, she’ll make bets with a couple of her old, wild girlfriends over which team pat the others fanny the most.
TYPE OF CAR – NONE! (Hell, she’s damn near 90, what do you expect?)
LAST BOOK – ‘Doggie Style 101’ by the ‘Back-Door Slammers’ from the over ’70’ Club.
TURN ONS – Young men’s sweaty muscles glistening on the beach, winning a big state lottery to impress young studs and hanging around men’s shower stalls after a game.
TURN OFFS – Old dudes trying to act young, middle-age dudes always complaining about their aches and pains, annoying people who keep reminding her of her age, and all the dudes trying to wear condoms they know are way too big.
SECRET FANTASY – To be voted “the hottest senior citizen of the 21st Century.”
ASTROLOGICAL SIGN – Cancer
PERSONALITY – This old bag knows what she wants in life and goes after it (especially ANY well-built, well-hung young stud will do)! Her demeanor toward the opposite sex sometime makes you wonder; if she really cares what’s thought of her. But really she don’t give a shit!
She thinks that being in the company of much younger men, make other women think they’re not popular enough. She also doesn’t realize that some of these men she know, only socialize with her because she’s lonely and have money.
These men also know that they could get anything their hearts desire by just telling her how sexy her old ass is.
IDEAL MAN – The wild, young liberal type. One who understands her needs and love trying out new positions.
WHERE TO MEET – You could run into sluts like this hanging around any convention in town promoting their large display of sex toys.
GOAL – To invite all hot, horny studs across America for an all-night sex orgy.
RATING: 3.9…If money and a sense of security is something you feel is important, then maybe this fun-loving ol’ bag is not for you. But keep the age difference in focus.
Your buddies might think you’ve cracked up when they spot you and her together. They’ll swear you’re out with your grandma! But all you’re trying to do with Doris is staying on her good side and out of her doghouse!
‘Meet The Author & Creator’
Ronald Kennedy
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So what do you think? Did you enjoy this crazy article on Dirty Ol’ Doris? Let me know through your comments.
Ron J Kennedy,
This is the best laugh I have had in a week; you have missed your calling!
You could easily write stand up comedy and be winning awards for it.
The article is not just funny but we all happen to know a woman just like this one in each and every small town across America. Which only makes the post that much funnier.
Thank you so much for this it was the highlight of my day.
Susan
Thank you Susan, for your kind comment regarding my post. I love it when I’m told I’ve made someone’s day (especially with all the daily crap you hear on the news that pulls you down.) Yes, I agree that where ever you go, what ever you do, you gonna run across some old horney bag that thinks she’s all that! Very mixed-up person!
Well Ron, I don’t know what to say except for thank you. This really made me laugh out loud and each heading was funnier than the one before. You really cheered me up with this.
You are so correct as well as there are always going to be people like this out and about on the streets and in pubs etc. I just got such a vision of what I thought Ol’ Doris looked like and that made your post even funnier.
I will certainly be back to read more soon.
Thank you my friend Cheryl, for stopping by and hanging out with me and dirty ol’ Doris. LOL. Yes, like you stated, you’ll find this type in every bar across the usa. They’ll think they’re hot as hell and can lasso any young stud that comes along. They don’t understand, at their age, they need to ‘slow down’, but that’s NO where in sight and No where part of the agenda.
You are very welcome and I agree that yes they do need to slow down. You just made me laugh and laugh with this one because it was not at all what I had expected it to be. Thank you.
Thanks Cheryl. I’m Happy you enjoyed it. Plenty of old buck-wild Doris type women who’s out of control still running around seeking love. Mainly it’s the money, liquor, and drugs that keeps her interested in these young studs.
I’m not sure how I landed on this page but this is some funny stuff!! You have some great content.
Ol’ Doris isn’t going out without a bang, no pun intended. But the description you have in your post definitely reflects a lot of women like Doris I have seen around.
Thank you Vin for reading my post. (See Vin, that accidental page landing gave you the opportunity to view some funny stuff)lol. Ol’ Doris is gonna hang in their as long as she can get young dudes to keep treating her to drinks and they have a pocket full of bucks to spend. These ol’ Doris type do get around and are known everywhere!
Yes, I agree, Ron J Kennedy, that loving this old bird can be a crazy experience. As Susan rightly said, “The article is not just funny but we all happen to know a woman just like this one in each and every small town across America.” Apart from the article being hilariously funny, I have found such grandmas on adult sites. I loved the heading parts. One start thinking of something but then discovers something else. You’re a master of puns! I have never read such a funny blog and I think it can make people’s days, especially if they feel down and out. You certainly made my day, because I was feeling bad for something which happened at home! Thank you!
Thank you my friend Akoli, for reading and commenting on this ol’ buzzard. Lol. Doris is rated in a ‘special class’ along with other ol’ bats, who think they’re hot. When I created this character’s image and profile, I thought to myself, “I’m glad my grandma wasn’t like this.” But I know this type exist; Somewhere in the good old USA.
woops, i almost spit my coffee out twice reading this! Very hilarious… ! The best part is, i use to know someone like Dirty Doris… Except she was a waitress at a coffee shop I use to frequent in college and a local legend… and her name was DOT!! (which sounds like it could be a nickname for Doris!!) How could that be? LOL ah, maybe YOU knew her too?
No Jackie, I never personally knew Doris, from your college days. LOL. If she was anything like Dirty Ol’ Doris, then she was a ‘real card.’ These old bats love seeking out young studs and doing weird stuff. (They’re in a class by themselves); All Hot, Oiled up and Ready to Go!! Lol
Hi Ron. Well I needed a good laugh. No, make that we all need a good laugh, and you’re providing it. I love Dirty Ol Doris. She sounds like my kind of woman, only thing is my aches and pains might put her off. Thanks for the giggles. Jim
Yes Willem Jim, Dirty Ol’ Doris don’t want no man with aches and pains, she wants them young and strong. LOL! Glad you got a good laugh from this broken down old bird, who’s too ‘hot to trot.’
I found this article really funny. You actually did make a few good points. I needed a real good laugh and this really brought that along. It’s crazy what we see in today’s world. What a humorous spin on real life situations. Grannies are stronger today than ever before. They know how to get down and go wild. What an excellent sense of humor.
Thank you Angelina my friend. Glad you enjoyed my ‘hot old friend.’lol. Yes, these Doris-types are found in every city around the globe. What they missed out on in their younger years, they sure as hell make up for it later. Like ol’ Doris would say, “Hell, age is only a number. You’re only as old as you feel, so bring on the young studs.”
Hey Kennedy!
This is really a creative work.
You did a nice job, though funny. You deserve some accolades.
The write ups is well pictured. If you really enlist among the best creative writer and funny articles, I think I will surely vote for you. Lol.
You really did a nice job here!
Thank you my friend. Dirty ol’ Doris has really drawn a lot of attention and praise from its readers. This ol’ bird is here to stay; creating more havoc on her young lovers by introducing them to new sexual ways that are beyond even their imagination.lol. Thanks for reading.
OMG that is funny. And what makes it funnier is I can relate. On several levels. LOL I am a 65 yr old boy toy lol. My older woman is not quite the same as that one but there are a couple similarities. Thanks for the laugh and yes you are forcing me to click links and read more!
Hi Dennis, Thanks for reading my post. You’re the first one to say you have your own personal ‘Doris’ on your hands. LOL. (Have fun with that!) These types are ‘one of a kind.’ They love sex more than you do! They will wonder why you can’t keep up. Yeah, these old birds are pretty wild & here to stay! Thanks again for checking in.
this is absolutely hilarious , really.
Keep them coming, i will be returning to see what else you have came up with.
You should have had a newspaper collumn 🙂 really really enjoy reading your writing.
I hope dirty old doris gets what she wants….. the sly old fox.
Is this the only kind of comedy work you have written? would love to see more.
Hi Jake. I’m glad I was able to ‘tickle your funny bone.’ Really! Dirty ol’ Doris is in a class by herself. All across America you’ll find a dirty Doris as someone friend, neighbor or family member. She will get what she wants; trust me! I enjoy writing this style of ‘Madness’ and been doing it for years. (Love comedy and making people laugh). Jake, you can see more of this style of comedy in my book, “How to Select a Compatible Mate.” Click here: https://www.smashwords.com/boo…
Interesting article Ronald!
I have noticed that many women and men, as they get older, they start looking for relationships with younger people.
I used to think that these people just love life and want to live it to the fullest. But then, why do they like younger people in particular? Can’t they live life to the fullest with people of their age?
Sometimes I feel like these people actually just want anything that makes them look younger and that’s it. It’s not really about enjoying life.
What do you think about this?
Amjad
Amjad, I think that older folks just like being around younger mates just because it makes them feel good. They look for someone younger that has energy and like to do stuff. (Hey, there’s some older folks with more energy than younger ones). To me, age don’t me crap! It all depends on the person.
Not sure what to make of this. Is this an actual online dating profile you came across? I came across your site looking for dating advice. But like I said I’m not sure what to make of this post. This is definitely a strange one, completely out there. Maybe she needs a tinder account.
Well Mapofthat, what you experienced was the comedy portion of my site. (You’re right! Maybe Dirty ol’ Doris needs her own dating account.) You came across one of my original characters created just to give readers a good laugh. (Every now and then, we need that!) My friend, go back in and select another site subject based on what you’re looking for, https://lovefolks.com . I have many other articles. Or Mapofthat, just tell me what advice do you seek? I can help you.
I must thank you for this article, Ronald. You have made my day. Although it is funny there is a truth. I can say that I know a person of this kind and those people are very funny and what I saw is that they really enjoy in life. Who knows, maybe we will be the same in that years haha. I will come back for sure to read more about this! Thank you once more for this interesting topic.
Thank you Daniel for getting ‘a kick’ from my article. There are many old buzzards out there; young at heart and horney as hell. Seems everyone who reads this characters profile, seem to know at least one old lady like this. All around the globe, there’s an ol’ Doris ready to bang some young stud!
You have just made my day. After a rubbish morning I really needed a laugh. I am sat here chuckling away to myself, than my partner in the living room had to come into my office to see what I was giggling at. My imagination was running wild when reading this, trying to picture someone in my local pub who fits the bill. I really loved the detailed profile of Dirty Ol Doris.
Thank you for cheering me up today
P.s Please keep writing articles like this
Hey David, I plan on writing humor as long as my fingers can punch the keys on my laptop. This is my favorite thing. I love making people laugh. And it makes me feel good that as my reader, you enjoy my work. Whenever, you have a bad day, just read any of my characters and you’ll feel better. (you also can see more in my book).
Hi Ronald,
I was sitting here with this big frown on my face thinking how the hell I am going fit everything I need to do into this day. While I contemplated this and messing around on the internet I came across your post. I just want to say thank you very much for putting a big smile on my face. If she can do it, I can do it. Not the s** part, but fitting everything into my day. I am much younger and going to show Doris how it is really done:))
Thanks for a good laugh and have a great weekend!
Hi Rika. You Go Girl!! Show ol’ Doris how it’s done. You know Rika, Doris is ‘Hot to Trot’ and she mean business when it comes down to ‘hooking up’ with the young studs out here or whatever town she’s in. (It seems there’s a dirty ol’ Doris in every town!) Thanks Rika for checking in.
Haha! Brilliant. You dont really see posts like this everyday (trust me i know). Deloris sounds like an absolute gem. Its like someone forgot to tell her how “old people” are supposed to behave! I think that there are actually quirky characters out there which makes this post even more brilliant.
I am sure Deloris believes in the teaching of the wise master Yoda, “Do or do not, there is no try!”
Renton, thank you for reading and enjoying my post. Yes I agree that Dirty ol’ Doris is in a ‘class by herself.’ There is a Doris in every trailer park across America, and in someone’s family. (You know who you are out there!) These are the families who have that drunken old auntie or cousin that think she knows everything, and always on the lookout for that next, ‘hot young stud.’
This was quite a read! I have never had an experience as such, however I really think it would be interesting to experience this. However, I don’t think dirty ol’ Doris can still experience love, I also know she doesn’t expect to. If ever I was to indulge in such, it would probably be because of the greens!
Hey Louis, I guess you say, ‘Money Talks.’ “Show me the money!” A rich and horny old broad like this is sure to show you a good time. (If she doesn’t collapse first from too much excitement. LOL) Hey my man, give it a try! There’s one out there for every young stud! Share ol’ Doris around.
Hi first thought when I see the title was what the heck is this serious, but when I start reading it starts to make me smile and after scrolling more down it makes me laugh. This was a very fun read and I share it with some of my friends. Gonna check out more on your website in the hope to find more stuff that makes me laugh.
Thanks a lot your shit is funny.
Tommy, thanks for reading. Glad you got a kick out of it. Every now and then, I like to break from all the seriousness that’s happening around, and provide some humor. We all need a good laugh once in a while. With Doris and my other characters I’ve compiled together, you’ll be laughing a ‘mile-a-minute’. Check out 30% of my book Free,
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/717520
Nice makeup story there, I can’t stop laughing and wondering at the same time, it really interesting
but as interesting as it is, I find it informative and educative about Ol’Doris and what it is,
at first I was thinking something else without knowing where you will land the story with our investing it is. I know of some woman that can’t do without Ol’Doris
Yes my friend ajibola40, this old bag is in a class all by herself. When old dames like this get their minds set on something (especially some young meat), they can’t be stopped. Ol’ Doris would say, “Live damit, and let live.” Share ol’ Doris with your downline.
Thanks for the laughs Ronald,
I don’t see posts like this everyday. It had me cringing, laughing and imagining dirty old Doris.
Extremely cringe worthy. I’d hope people Doris’s age can act in a more dignified, respectful manner.
But this is fantasy and thanks Ronald for making us laugh through your persona of dirty old Doris.
You could do stand-up comedy – or at least sell this post to comedians 🙂
Hi John. Thanks for checking in, reading and getting a good laugh. I agree with you 100% John….you will not see a post of this type, anywhere online. This is a very original concept regarding selecting a compatible mate, and what types they’ll find in the dating arena. Another reader once before mention I should be doing stand-up comedy after reading one of my character’s post. Hey John, maybe my own TV special? LOL. If you wanna get a 30% Free peak at my book and more characters, “How to Select a Compatible Mate” click link below…
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/717520
This was a good online performance, I admire your talent and mehn!!!! That kinda woman is really a handful, I couldn’t stop me laughing along side my friend whom I showed this article, we both laughed without control. I think you should switch to comedy the mics are waiting for you.
I appreciate the compliments my friend. For sure, Ol’ Doris is definitely a handful. No one like her on the face of the earth! I’m happy that you and your friend got a big kick out of this profile. You mentioned hitting the mic for stand-up comedy. Only thing, when a mic is in front of me, I’ll be ready to sing. I’m a singer also and love music. Please share my post with your social media downline.
Lol…. I can stop laughing ,this the best laugh for this month. This is the funniest post I ever read online. How I wish I can send this old dude and go on a bettings. We really looks alike but age difference, she does every of my hobby and I don’t care to run competition with her. Some old woman can be so funny. Your article made my day. Hahaha
My friend, Dirty Ol’ Doris wanted me to tell you that She’s Available. LOL, LOL, Just think, there’s a Dirty Ol’ Doris in every trailer park, every family in any city. I don’t think anyone will have a hard time finding this type. She’s hot to trot, and Ready to go!! Glad you enjoyed it, my friend!
Wow! How a funny article! “How Loving This Old Bird Can Be A Crazy Experience.” just made me laugh a lot. At the age of 67, she wants the wild, young liberal type. One who understands her needs and love trying out new positions. This type of character can be found everywhere to make us laugh.
Thanks
Hey Amod, it seems there’s an old, crazy chick in everyone’s family. This is the wild one who likes getting high and flirting with all the younger guys who come along. She knows what she wants and goes after it without hesitation. Ol’ Doris also loves a good challenge. She’ll out perform any young stud under the sheets. LOL.
wonderful, that was really funny. As I was reading through the article, I couldn’t help but just laughing. That was very comedic, and each step of it as I was reading down, was funnier. You are talented in writing comedy. When I finally finished the article, I was now trying to imagine what the 67 year old Doris will look like. I just got the picture I’m my head, but will such personality really exist in this life?
Thanks my friend. I also got a good laugh out of this character while creating it. (When I can get a good laugh from my own creations, then I know I have ‘a winner.’) LOL. As a writer of comedy, I like to create and connect it to what’s happening now. The real world. There is no element of surprise when it comes down to these old horny type. To answer your question Barry, there seem to be one in every moderen today’s family!
What a funny and engaging content I have read this morning. I am giving you lots of applauds from here. You really cracked me up. There are similar women like the old Doris everywhere. They are so horny and tasty of sex all the time. They are never ready to retire on bed and always wants something in and out of their horny pot. Some of the old birds here believe they are too sexy and beautiful and they forgot the fact that young adults here are only after their money. Its funny! I feel like to read this article over and over again.
Glad you liked my funny post, Kenechi. I try to keep things real through comedy. I like funny stuff and love making other people laugh. There’s enough sadness, misery and strife in our world today. So why not throw something out there that will take a person’s mind off things; even for a moment? Ol’ Doris will do it to you every time!
Now, this was hilarious. Ol’ Doris just trying to live her life to the fullest before she leaves the life, she doesn’t understand why you should call her “dirty” or make fun of her life. She’s living the life of her dreams and she gonna be ballin till she pass out to the great beyond. And she deserves to, she has just this life after all. I applaud her for not letting the sickness of age get her down like it has most of her age’s mate. And those young dudes loving her, they’re the best, helping make the world go round 😉
Hi Vapz, glad you got a kick out of my funny post. Ol’ Doris is gonna live her life to the fullest, and no one’s gonna stop her. “Living each day as if it’s your last” is her motto. “Live and let live” is the other. “Screw all the hot, horny young studs you can find” is her third. These are Dirty ol’ Doris words to live by. Please share my post.
This is a pretty funny blog post. While this is not my thing I guess I can understand how it might be for some other people. Why do you think that a higher age is better for doing the deed and why did you decide to write this article? Are you doing mini biographies like this for a lot of people and trying to give people a different view of higher age people?
Hi Jon. Thanks for stopping by. This crazy old character is in a class by herself. I decided to create a swinging old granny type who likes to party and is business-minded as well. She have always harbored her own goals and ideas since an early age (not all older folks are this outgoing.) If you’d like to see a free sample of other characters, go here: https://www.smashwords.com/boo…
Hahaha! OMG! I couldn’t stop laughing because the description seemed like my former neighbor. God, this was funny. Probably the highest I laughed from reading a blog post. I really have to say thank you for hooking up words to form this beautiful post. I will come back to read more and more of your posts. I need to crack up often with this. 😂😂
Hi Ro, thanks for stopping by and spending time with ol’ Doris. (She’s always on the lookout for young new, fresh meat) LOL! Hey, she may be your former neighbor’s room mate. LOL. There seem to be a horney old bird like this residing in everyone’s neighborhood. If you really liked this character profile, then you gonna like these others. Click here: https://www.smashwords.com/boo…
Dirty Ol’ Doris who can screw every brain out is a superlative line I’ve ever come across. Her frenzy habit of music being as horny and freaking as the world can offer out there has pulled out my entrails to confirm that she’s a swapping maniac.
I am really scared of Dirty Ol’ Doris and pray that I should never encounter such a dominating sex lover.
The food menu consisting of old cabbage plants with cesar dressing and a dish of Muskrat stew and boiled owl heads is appalling. Not only that her dessert that has a slice of baboon pie topped with wild cherries is frightening.
Whatever the case might be, this crazy world embellished with eroticism as that of Dirty Ol’ Doris is unique and deserves all applause from all corners!
Thanks for sharing your fantastic article and I do look forward to reading more of your interesting pieces.
Cheers!
Hi my friend, Yes Ol’ Doris is a real character. An ol’ bird that’s in a class by herself. Love sex, and ready to bang at the ‘drop of a hat.’ But she always has her business on her mind. She loves to bang and make money! If you really like this profile, then check out these others. Go to:
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/717520
I had to reread this lol. How the heck does one go from the Golden Girls to that other stuff lol. Anyways, great write-up man; Seems like you got a knack for writing comedy pieces/sketches. Surely there’s got to be a way to get this turned into a YouTube comedy series of some sort lol
Hi Nate. Thanks for stopping by, my friend. Glad you enjoyed Dirty ol’ Doris. She’s a real pistol. This old bag is in a class by herself. Yes, Nate I love writing comedy and that YouTube suggestion is something I may just have to look into. I just have to figure out how to make it work. Thanks for checking in with me. Love the feedback!
I don’t know what to say except you have a humorous way of getting your point across.
The really funny thing is that I know a lady in her mid-60s who passes for Doris, but is a lot more subtle in her use of words and way with men. She has a very seductive way of talking and people of all kinds love to listen to her speak. After a time, you understand what she is really after!
Yes Stella. It seems to be an Ol’ Doris type in every city, in every neighborhood, around the globe. You’ll spot them in any juice joint or pub, hanging on to some young stud who’ll show them a little attention. Ol’ Doris is someone that really wants you to understand her wild ways. But it may be hard. Funny, but hard nevertheless.
Wow, that’s quite a title! It is eye-catching and attention-grabbing and makes the reader want to engage with your content. Your introduction to “Dirty Ol Doris” was hilarious and informative! The vitals you list and the cartoon makes me wonder why would anyone want to date her? You make it clear that plenty of sex is in store but one still has to question the efficacy of such a relationship when there may be Younger alternatives. Is this written for older men? It would appear that the answer is no because you state, “They’ll swear you’re out with your grandma!” Is Doris a real person or a great archetype?
In the end, you provide good resource material about dating over 50, internet dating tips and finding a compatible mate. Doris’ story makes the reader want to read all your content.
Thanks Ronald for checking in. Most folks get a real kick out of Ol’ Doris, and reading about her wild-ways. To answer your question, Doris is a fictional character, but her profile matches the many ‘old swingin’ bags’ residing throughout the many different cities throughout the world. There’s no age limit with her when it comes to dating. (A 30 year old young buck is just fine with her.)lol
Hi Ron.
I must thank you for this type of article. The article was a lot of fun. But after reading this article I got the idea about sex. Older people find youth as sex partners. But I feel like these people really just want anything that makes them look younger and that’s it. It’s not really about enjoying life.
Thanks for a good laugh.
Thank you for reading my friend. I’m so glad you enjoyed it. Funny articles which make people laugh, is one of my favorite things ( ..next to having sex.)lol. I’m an older guy still loving it, in regards to lovin’ young women.) To me, when I love a younger woman, hell that’s enjoying life to me. As long as God keep me healthy everyday, I’m gonna keep on sharing my love.
Itis a real nice article: Everyone experiences flirting at some stage in their life, whether it is intentional or unintentional and it plays a very important part in finding that special person which could possibly lead to a thriving relationship. I also think The key principle of flirting is to send out signals to others that you are attracted to them and would like to get closer to them.
Hi Fabio. Thanks for reading my post. I guess when it comes to dating, age is only a number. Like ol’ Doris, she takes no man seriously and will get what she wants (either by hook or crook). She will send strong signals out to any young stud who captures her attention. She will get what she wants! Please share with others.
LOL. This article is funny, I had a good laugh. Sad to say but, there are real people like Dirty Ol’ Doris. It is pretty scary. I avoid the likes of Dirty Ol’Doris by staying out of bars since that is likely where she spend her evenings. You have a real talent for telling a funny story. Keep up the good work.
Thanks Tom for stopping by and checking out my post. Yes I agree, there are Dirty Doris’s in every city and small town you might visit. Tom, you mean to tell me, you don’t want to go out drinking and having fun with ol’ Doris?? LOL. Remember, she’s always available for any guys. But mainly young studs with a fat wallet. Please share my article with others.
This cracks me up Ronald,
With some hidden truth to it too! I can’t help but feel as though I’m qualified for Doris lol! But in all honesty, I’ve never done with one with a Doris before though I do have a lot of offers especially when I meet clients on meetings. The thought has crossed my mind though, oh well maybe I’m not adventurous enough. Just wondering, have you ever had the pleasure? 😀
To answer your question, ol’ Doris is a little to wild for me. LOL. So I’d have to pass. (Hell, she’d probably wear me out!) Ol’ Doris does get around, doing her thing. She like ’em young! (No old guys allowed)! Doris says, “The only thing that an old man can do for her, is to go out and find her a young man.” Doris is definitely adventurous and will experiment every chance she get.
Freakin hilarious post!
Even though I don’t have much experience in the field of dating older women, I do find it somewhat fascinating and intriguing.
It sends chills up my spine just thinking How To Love A Horny Grandma | Profile Of Dirty Ol’ Doris
How Loving This Old Bird Can Be A Crazy Experience.
I’m open to suggestions.
To Your Success,
$haun
P.S.-Although, I am into trying anything once, just so I could say I’ve tried that.
Like I said, no experience! I’m open to suggestions.
Hey Shaun my best suggestion is just GO FOR IT!! Hang out in the lobby of any nursing home, senior citizen building or your local church bingo hall, you’re bound to score! LOL. In the market while shopping, (these old bags shop early) strike up a conversation. They lonely and love to talk.
Shaun, I offer a 10 part series dating & relationships. Wanna see another crazy profile? Go to https://lovefolks.com/how-to-love-a-lush-profile-of-guzzlin-gus Shuan, before you leave the page, don’t forget to put in your information to receive a free downloadable copy of my book. Thanks.
Wow, Dirty Doris is really something! You’re description about Doris and how she prey at younger men is really hilarious! Funny but true, most of us has seen a Dirty Doris just around the town looking overly and heavily accessorized, extra sweet on men but a bit snobbish on women.
My daughter just caught me laughing especially on the prune juice part. She asked why and I said I’m reading something funny. She wanted to take a look but I said I already clicked to other page! Of course, I can’t show Dirty Dorris to the kid. Oh my, Ron! First it was the mama’s boy and now dirty Dorris! Can’t wait for the next one!
Hi MissusB. Thanks for dropping by. Glad you enjoyed the crazy ass profile of Dirty Doris. Yes, she’s really something. Ol’ Doris is ready, always willing and able. Sexually, she’ll out perform any woman 50 years younger. I agree with you, that every small town has an over-eager old bat, who things she’s sexy, and hot. Young men..Watch Out! (Old Doris Is Coming To Get You.)LOL!! Please share ol’ Doris with others.
Lmao,…when I first saw the headline of this post, I thought, what ?… but when I started reading it I couldn’t help laughing, thank you for giving me a good laugh by the way, I think I needed it,…lol, I think we all know someone like dirty ol Doris, or at least someone similar to Doris, anyway Ronald, thank you for posting, I think we all need a good laugh occasionally, keep them coming.
Russ
Thank you Russ for reading and enjoying my post. As you mentioned, there are types like this all over. If you think about it, there’s a dirty doris in every trailer park you may visit. (She may even be your next door neighbor, waiting to flirt at every chance she get). WATCH OUT, NOW!!! Ol’ Doris is out on the prowl.
Great article and found this really interesting to read. It is eye-catching and attention-grabbing and makes the reader want to engage with your content. Your introduction to “Dirty Ol Doris” was hilarious and informative! You’re a description of Doris and how she prey at younger men is really hilarious! Funny but true, most of us have seen a dirty Doris just around the town looking overly and heavily accessorized, extra sweet on men but a bit snobbish on women. Is Doris a real person or a great archetype?
Thanks for sharing your knowledge of this one.
Hey my friend, thanks for reading. Glad you enjoyed it. To answer your question, Ol’ Doris is fictional, but her personality is ‘real-life.’ Ol’ Doris takes her hot actions very seriously. Loves to flirt and have sex. Please share my post with others.
Well, I don’t know how I feel after reading this..is this like some sort of guide what to expect or what to look for when looking for an older woman? Or is it me and I don’t understand men jokes. I get that the dirty ol’ Doris is a nickname for a type of elderly women, but it still sounds more like a underdeveloped Hollywood character.
I’m confused.
Don’t be confused my dear Katya. You got some of the post right. This is one old horney woman that represents many other old horny women around your town. Their actions are all alike. I’m giving young guys an ‘heads up’ when they’re approached by this type of woman. No surprises! Please share my post.
LOL. Can’t stop laughing. This is some funny stuff I have read in a long time. The best bit is turn offs of dirty ol’doris. They are genuine turn offs of old ladies. Hence, this post is real in that sense. I have bumped into one of these ol’Doris and it was funny but after reading this it brought all those memories back. Thank you for sharing this post and lightening up my day.
Hey Anand, that’s the response most folks give after reading up on ol’ Doris. She is a character and will get what she wants. Doris is ‘hot to trot’ and will show you a wild, good time! Anand, please share ol’ Doris with others.
Hello Ronald,
Thank you for such an article. It’s full of fun but behind the funny scene, you pick the truth to the readers. The most noticeable information about your article is that one must remember his/her age with his partner. If there is much difference with one’s partner it will be a source of a great laugh. We always see these types of incidents around our society. Ol’ Doris is the representative figure of those people.
Thank you!
Thank you for reading, my friend. Yes, there are some truths sprinkled throughout this article, along with a lot of other funny stuff. My character’s profile shows Doris good side, and bad side (but mostly bad!) Check out any local area pub and you’ll find this type. Thanks for stopping by.
Interesting commentary on some funny subjects! Thanks for the laugh and unique subject matter. I know a few people who could use a few of the tips you’ve mentioned. My husband and I got a quite a chuckle. We may stop back and read a few more of your funny pieces.
Hi Andria, thanks for reading dirty ol’ Doris. Glad you got a kick out of my funny profile. You can find this type in any neighborhood (may even be your next door neighbor). If you think others will enjoy ol’ Doris, please pass my site along for others to checkout. Thanks.
Wow I haven’t laugh this hard for a while! in order for something to be funny there has to be a ring of truth to it! I have actually met some women like this! I am old codger myself ( 65 ).
these type of ladies aren’t cougars but Honey Badgers!,hey go all in. Tell me how did you do your research for this post? How does society see a dirty ol grandma as opposed to a dirty ol grandpa? I gather that a grandpa is forgiven more easily than a grandma1
Hey, Robert. Thanks for reading and enjoying my post. Yes, you can find these old horny buzzards in any small town and big city. To answer your question, my ideas just come from my head. I think of a character, write out a funny profile and at the same time, have a good idea of a funny drawing. All this just develop in my head!
A dirty old man could be just as bad as a dirty old woman. The old man will be going after all the young chicks. You get the idea. Please share my post with others.
Hehehe, I got a good old laugh out of this one.
The Memoirs of a Doris here provide a pretty good read.
She seems to be a bit of a jack of all trades in terms of her occupation.
Doesn’t everyone love a footy-loving lady… It appears that way, Doggie Style 101 could well attest to that.
Uh oh Shane, be ready! Ol’ Doris maybe coming for you! (She like young studs!)LOL!! She’s for sure in a class by herself! No one understands her and what she does, her actions or who’s she banging. She likes it that way! She thinks she’s sexy and hot! No one can tell her otherwise. The public has to deal with it!!
Thanks for the funniest article I’ve read in a long time. I’ve never read anything like this before but it was a great read, and might I add, this old bag is not for me and I’ll have to keep it for the wild, liberal type guys. They seem to love the 3.9ers 🙂 Cheers again, will be back for more laughs!
Hey,and just think Brandon these old ‘hot’ (at least they think they are) and ‘horny’ bags think they can pull any young stud that comes along. They set their minds on something and go after it. They don’t mess around! You may even have an old chick like this living right down the hall. LOL Please share my post with others.
Dirty Ol’Doris ought to have plenty of dirty old men knocking down her door. Too funny! What an interesting concept and a something that anyone can “share” with a friend or loved one! Doris hopefully isn’t too selective when it comes to her choices. I think this is a must read! Is there a Dirty Ol’Dave?
Michelle
Thanks for stopping by! Hey, who knows Michelle; a dirty counterpart may be on the horizon.LOL. Maybe Dirty Ol’ Doris needs an old companion, but it will never work out for her. She’s into the ‘youngbloods.’ Doris will tell you in a second that; “the only thing an old man can do for her is go find her a young man!” Brandon, please share my article with others.
Oh my, your sense of humour is something out of this world. I just couldn’t stop laughing after every single heading. I think after reading your post, I get the picture of what kind of person ol’ Doris is and it’s really through that one can find this type of women who just don’t care, but for no one.
Hi Henderson, my friend. I love that you say my sense of humor is “out of this world.” …and to that I’ll say, “Hell Yeah, It Is! LOL. I try to be different than other comedy writers and illustrators. I want to ‘stand out’ so to speak! And I think I’ve proven myself time & time again. Glad you got your laugh on! Please share this with other.
Thanks for this hilarious post! It’s morning and you’ve already made my day :D. Your descriptions are so detailed that I can totally believe someone like this in real life. I’m sure there are old people like Doris out there and I think it’s good that they know what they want and not let their age stop them, but I think they shouldn’t get too crazy given their old age. I enjoyed reading this post very much.
MaryLi, welcome to my crazy world of zany folks!! LOL! Thanks for reading. Just think MaryLi, you can spot these Doris types a mile away. She’ll be coming down the street and more than likely hanging on some young studs arm! Hell, ol’ Doris don’t play! Please share this post with others.
Hi Dirty Ol’Doris,
This article is so much fun and special. I have to say you provide a vision that I never thought in the past. I think the basic key for all of us is that we all need to be loved and need someone as a company no matter how old we are. I love all the stuff you mentioned that a senior women’s references in this article and they are so hilarious.
For a society that faces more senior generations currently, I think it’s better we are open-minded to learn their need for future changes. So, I think I am ready for my grandparents’ same request or my parents…
Thank you, Matt. On behalf of Doris and myself, we appreciate your kind comments. If Ol’ Doris were here right now Matt, she’d treat you to a drink and a night of ‘rolling in the hay.’ LOL!! Ol’ Doris is a ‘real pistol,’ firing on all chambers. She just don’t slow down and frown on you for not keeping up! Please share my post with others.