Originally Published: Oct 30, 2018
Veterinarian Vera Is A Stalker And A Pest.
She Sometimes Treat Her Men Like They All Have Fleas.
Vera always wanted to be a veterinarian because she loved animals. She’s a 27 year old female who applied to a good veterinarian school, but got kicked out only after three weeks.
Determined to get established in this field, she decides to use every trick in the book. One way to get in is to get very friendly with the Head Of the Deans Department, then sleeping with the Chairman of the Veterinarian’s Board of Directors.
Folks who knows her don’t consider her a ‘bonafide’ career woman. Vera; better known as ‘Veterinarian Vera.’ did finally get a veterinarian’s license that many folks think she paid for.
She also claim to love all kinds of animals, but many of her clients swear they’ll never take their pet back to her again. They feel she’s unprofessional, mistreats their animals and do drugs.
Vera treats her men like she do her clients pets. (Keep them on a leash, down on all fours and make them beg for affection).
So with all said and done, lets take a look at what Vera is all about:
Veterinarian Vera
VITAL STATISTICS – Age: 24 to 48 Height: 5’1″ to 5’6″ Weight: Dogmatic
OCCUPATION – When she’s not mistreating her client’s animals or tending to some homeless mutt, she’ll volunteer to work the front office part-time just to see what records she could falsify, steal or destroy.
FAVORITE FOODS – If this is the type of girl you’re seeking, then prepare to chow down on some fried rabbit patties smothered in raccoon sauce.
She’ll also offer you a side dish of bullhead onion soup with stale oyster crackers.
Dessert will be a slice of warmed over baboon pie topped with Cool Whip.
FAVORITE DRINKS – If you pop over some evening unexpected, you might find her sitting on the sofa sipping Bullfrog beer and downing shots of Southern Comfort, one after another.
This sudden drinking urge normally takes place after work and comes in spurts. After hours of this non-stop drinking madness, she becomes delirious.
Soon she starts babbling about being overworked, catching a sexual disease from a one-night stand and not getting a discount on those cheap breast implants she had done 2 years ago.
FAVORITE MUSIC – Guys if she’s for you, then you better get used to listening to things she classify as music. If you two are cruising down the highway in her little car, she’ll pop in a CD recording of her teaching dogs new tricks….such as howling together in harmony.
She’ll also serenade you with her terrible singing voice. (Again, MORE howling)!
FAVORITE MOVIES/TV SHOWS – She enjoys old ‘Lassie’ videos and any ‘Animal Planet’ episodes. But her all-time favorite is ‘Lady and the Tramp’ (It moves her to tears).
FAVORITE SPORTS/HOBBIES – All dog competition events that week are high on her list. During her leisure time, you will join her in a long hike.
Later, she will challenge you to a foot race across the largest field in the country just to abuse a lonely, grazing cow.
Next stop, the zoo! She would pick the hottest day to walk, laugh and pet, …..while your ass sit, cuss and sweat!
TYPE OF CAR – You’ll join her on long drives in her old rusted 82′ Volkswagen Beetle. (Just be expecting to push when it breaks down on the road).
Very soon, and of course with your money, she’ll be able to purchase the car of her dreams….a 1983 pink Mustang!
LAST BOOK – ‘Why Most Dogs Look Like Their Owner’ by an author who’s unknown and too embarrassed to show his face.
TURN-ONS – Men who allow her to make house calls, men that know how to keep their mutt under control and men that like to spank her ass in bed.
TURN-OFF – Rival competition threatening to move on her block, customers who are always late paying their bills and people that park in her private spot. (You may get your tires slashed!)
SECRET FANTASY – To be treasurer of a world-class veterinarian convention in Death Valley, AZ at $800.00 a head. (..And after processing all the cash donations, she’s nowhere to be found.)
ASTROLOGICAL SIGN – Sagittarius
PERSONALITY –Truly a state-of-the-art type of girl, she is true to her craft and tries hard to take her business seriously.
She has the ability and know-how when it comes to pinning down the tiniest detailed problem in your animal. Regardless of the situation with your pet, she’s usually ‘Johnny On The Spot’.
She’s the type who would cheer at the sight of a little kid pulling a dog’s tail…and then get angry when the dog turns and bites him!
IDEAL MAN – She adores the company of a tall, slim and hairy man with a BIG Dog. (I’m talking about the four legged kind, so get your mind out of the gutter). Also, Vera expects her men to be quiet and obedient.
In the bedroom, she captivates them by shaking her tight ass in their faces, then expects them to sit up with tongues drooling, begging for more!
WHERE TO MEET – You may meet a chick like this in the pet supply department at the local discount store, a dog grooming show and at the flea market.
GOAL – To have the first 24 hour drive thru, drop-off service for your convenience. (She encourages you, your pet and your wallet to take advantage of this special service).
RATING – 5.3…..If you settle down with this type, you will have a pretty decent start in life.
A simple house with a white picket fence that need repainting, a used van that doesn’t run half the time, doggie poop stains in the carpet, and every breed of animal you can think of running around tearing up the place. (Vera won’t have time to take care of them.) It’ll be all on you, bro! So good luck with that shit.
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This topic is one of the most interesting. It sound pretty normal here. If this is not your favourite style of a woman who has taste of music and quite ironic lifestyle then you be single instead of living with this. I really enjoy the twist the writer has made and some is grounded in a archetype reality. An abstract analysis on reality would bring ot a story and lifestyle similar to her lifestyle. Keep going author. I used to write like this before. Long time now
Thank you my friend for reading my post. Vera is in a class by herself. Not the normal type of business minded individual you’d normally run across. Taking reality and filtering in a touch of humor would make any material interesting to readers. Question for you Gustav, you mentioned writing in this format before, why did you give up writing humor?
Oh my, I am pretty sure I haven’t run across this type of woman myself and I hope not to, but she sounds alarming. Wait, her name wasn’t Vera, it was Bridgette. Still, scares me to think. Not thinking I will be calling her any time soon. Thanks for the insight and, ummm, warning?
Hi free4life. By the sound of your ID name, Bridgett must’ve had her ‘hooks’ deep in you and wouldn’t give you any slack. Glad you didn’t have a Vera type to deal with. She’s a ‘gold digger’ who wants it all. Yes, steer clear of Veterinarian Vera, (unless you wanna be treated like a dog)!
No one hopes to run across such a woman (or maybe some do). I do love a lady that likes dogs, but not to this extent. A lady that her favorite book is about dogs. That cannot be good.
she’s the sort of lady that can drive most men crazy. With her habits and all that.
I do like your writing style. Please keep it up
Yes Jay, Vera can be a ‘handful’ and sometime difficult to deal with. If you like dogs,that’s good. Telling Vera, once upon a time that you were bitten by one, she will be entertained by your story. Hanging out with this type usually would lead to disaster and you with a very empty wallet. Share my post with others Jay.
Everything about her is really not good, she is not having a good sense of humor. I rather be alone and be happy than to be with someone like her. Look… just imagine traveling on the highway with your love listening to the recording when she is with her dogs, it is really boring… That will mean i will be one of the dogs also and not anything else to her.
The way somebody treats animals states exactly the real person he or she is, if you have love for animals and care for them give them good food it really means you are really a good person but as for her it is a tragedy.
My friend, thanks for checking in. Once a guy starts dating veterinarian Vera, he’ll soon discover he’s bitten off more than he can chew. At times, she’ll feel like the best sex you ever had. But more than likely you’ll end up in a threesome; her, you and the dog! Share my post with others.
Great Post! Vera definitely does not sound soothing and comforting (like Aloe Vera – which is where I assume the name comes from). She seems like quite a sophisticated woman, she would probably be a very happy werewolf. She is quite hard to pin down (perhaps she is bipolar) because she claims to love animals but her behavior seems contradictory to that.
I think if I ever crossed paths with Vera I would probably run away very fast, although that is probably a bad idea because she may mistake me for a mutt and chase after me!
Truly wonderful piece of humor you have created here!
Hey Renton, you nail it right on the head with this chick. After a night out with Vera, you’ll be ready to seek out the nearest cliff to jump and ‘end it all!’ (she’ll drive a sane man nuts)! Bringing a very ‘fat wallet’ on your first date will bring ‘much joy and happiness’ to this deranged woman. Please share my post with others.
hahaha Hello, I really want to first appreciate your effort in putting this great website together and writing this article. i always look forward to your posts. i once knew a lady who fits the description of veterinarian vera in my hood and she was the talk of the town. so many people liked her still.
Thank you Benny for enjoying my works. I enjoy presenting funny stuff to my readers. I like creating fictional characters, with realistic type personalities and sprinkled with some prolific truth. Someone always seem to know a person who fits my character. Yes, like I say many truths are inserted within the profiles in a comical way. Please share with others.
Thank you very much for this wonderful article
Actually, I like your style, I have visited this site several times but I have not yet found any other of its type. Now you discuss this kind of interesting woman in such an enjoyable way. Man, I liked this and am in love with your style. I’am bookmarking this site cause I wouldn’t want to miss any article.
Thank you Mugalu for your kind compliments. It makes me happy knowing you’re an avid reader. I enjoy bringing out a good laugh among folks. As I create and I laugh, then I know it must be good and my writings will be enjoyed by others. Please share this post with others.
Why does Veterinarian Vera has to have one of my favorite car!! I love VW Beetle! Lol She sounds like a character though. She sounds just like a Cinderella step sisters, the real one from the original fairy tale where they were really mean and all. I love the nice touch that you put where we can meet her and what type of the man she likes.
What an interesting character, I’ll be sure to look out for Veterinarian Vera when I take my Shiro (my husky) in for a check up 😉
Yes my dear. Watch out for that crazy veterinarian who may mistreat your dog or cat. Although Vera means well, she sometimes let her hatred for animals get in the way. Being a veterinarian is just a coverup. She uses her position just to meet men who bring their pet in to be serviced. In reality, she can’t be trusted. Please share my post with others!
Hello and happy New year. You know, this is the first post I am reading from you this year and to be very honest, it is very good to see you with all this information about this kinds of women. The truth is that they really do exist and you have portrayed them just the what they are. I like this a lot and will share it.
Hello and Happy New Year to you too! Thanks for stopping by and reading my newest funny profile. Veterinarian Vera is a woman who’d rip u off by over-charging, give poor service to your pet and quickly blame blame the system for not being fair to her(Yeah, right! Like it’s your fault!) Better off going elsewhere and don’t get involved with her. She’ll screw you every time. Please share my post with others.
Rather a very interesting one again. Well, I do not know a vet personally so I couldn’t really resonate with this but taking nothing away from this here, this is definitely awesome to see here and I value all the I formation shared too. Well, it can always get better and it will in times more to come. I value your post here and definitely worthy to see. Thank you for sharing here
Hey Shey, veterinarian Vera character was just a ‘shot in the dark.’ I thought about this occupation and wanted to see if I can twist it into something funny and crazy. I made a lot of vet visits when I was with my late wife. (Some even after hours emergency visit). She loved animals, so I thought, “What the hell.” Thanks for reading.
This is a very interesting article to read through and I’ve enjoyed every bit of it that way that you have made it really understandable. Pets are like children that are meant to be catered for, a pet caregiver as well is a very important people to the pet and we should share as much love to them too.
Thank you my friend for checking in with me. I’m glad you understood someone not quite as crazy as Vera, but not all healthcare workers are nuts! Most handle animals very well. Then there are those that don’t give a crap. Only in the profession to meet others and of course, to make money as well. Share this with others