Ten Commandments List Of Rules For Women | Stonewall Facts
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These are helpful throughout the socializing process.
You’re an aging, married women whose headed for divorce. Things just haven’t been great. Those 12 years of marriage were the worst years of your life!
Periodically, you talk with your best friend about your situation, sobbing about the marriage that went sour. Your friend, who think she’s a pro when it comes to men but never married, makes you out a list of rules a woman should follow.
You clip the list inside your favorite book for a future read and study of these rules. Now the ‘Ten Commandments List Of Rules For Dating’ are now put into place.
You try to prepare yourself for that inevitable divorce and then, the single world. But you’re rusty! It’s been a while since you’ve dated and you’re aware things change. You understand there are good guys and bad guys out there. Race doesn’t matter either. You’re not prejudice or racist.
Either way, you want to do the right thing in the right way. You know most women are clueless to the dating game that just come out of broken marriages. Many need guidance to rectify the situation, but not from ‘well-meaning,’ unmarried friends.
Now you’re soon to become a divorced woman! Now maybe more romance will come into your life. Maybe!
You are new to dating and following your friends tips would be very helpful. No matter your age, race, or religion, these commandments are ‘set in stone’ just like the ones Moses received on Mount Sinai. You break them at your own peril.
Specially Chiseled Out For You: Laying Out The Facts…
1) Thou Shalt Return Calls Promptly. Return a potential’s call within 24 to 48 hours on weekdays, or 72 hours on weekends or holidays. Forget whatever Rules you’ve read, busy men get perturbed if they don’t hear back from you within that time frame.
If you’re missing each others calls, or if your text go unanswered, hear his explanation. It might be legit. Every guy isn’t all bad!
2) Thou Shalt Honor Thy Dating Commitments. Nobody likes a flake. When a man you think you might be interested in musters up the courage to ask you out (and believe me, it never gets any easier for a guy, no matter how experienced he is), you must make a plan with him and stick to it.
NOTE: If you meet a man who doesn’t honor his dating commitments and is a double looker or best-offer boy, then he is not worth your time, love, or patience.
(Always keep in mind, the date, you’re trying to learn more about isn’t the only ‘fish in the sea.’ ) Remember, you’re just trying to keep yourself together and available for all future prospects.
3) Thou Shalt Let The Man Take The Lead. Let him call you first. Let him ask you out first. If he’s shy, feel free to invite him to a party or a group event, but let him be the one to make the first move and suggest the first date.
Let him feel he’s cleverly tracking you by suggesting where and when your first several dates will happen. Ladies remember, if you want to be romanced, let the man lead – there’s no way around that.
If you don’t let the man lead, you’ll turn him into a couch potato.
4) In The Beginning, Thou Shalt Leave The Past In The Past. Any long talks of past marriages, old boyfriends or girlfriends is strictly taboo at first (and forever, if you can get away with it).
Men can’t help it – they will picture you naked and having sex with some other guy, and they’d really rather not go there.
5) Thou Shalt Be Engaging. Focus your attention on him – don’t let your eyes or interest wander, even if the waiter has the most adorable butt you’ve ever seen.
Let him look into those baby blues, big browns, or gorgeous greens and make sure you gaze into his and make good conversation.
Ladies, here’s a great tip! For every three questions he ask you, ask one back.
If you let the man lead the conversation and give him home-court advantage, his chest will puff up, and other organs too! If you rather phone than text, then it should be on a 50-50 level. One shouldn’t out-talk the other.
This will give each of you a chance to know each other. No man likes a woman that runs off at the mouth 24/7. Remember, if you talk more than he does, and not having anything interesting to say, you will become annoying and you’ll put him to sleep.
6) Thou Shalt Not Drink Too Much On A Date. Although you might be tempted to throw back several back in an effort to relax, or maybe he’s plying you with really great wine, you want to stay clear and focused at all times (usually more than two drinks will cloud a girl’s judgement).
Besides, if it’s a really great date, you’ll want to remember every second of it.
7) Thou Shalt Not Be A Gold Digger. Don’t You DARE ask or hint for anything of monetary value!
Always remember, there are a lot of things that men hate about women.
If he offers to buy you something without so much as a hint from you, go ahead and accept it. But make sure there are No strings attached! Be ready to give it back if he starts hinting to you about the ‘color of your panties’ or asking do you like wearing ‘G’ Strings?. If he offers you cash, however, never, I repeat, NEVER accept it.
If he offer to pay a monthly bill you’ve been struggling with, DON’T let him do it. (I know this is tempting to many women out there!) Besides, what do we call women who accept money from men? (What’s that garden tool called)?
This is very important: You are NOT considered a gold digger, if you expect him to pay for the dates. But depending on ‘how cool’ you are with each other, it’s ok to ‘split the bill’ or you treat him every now and then.
If he expects you to pay or split the check or talks about moving in together and splitting the rent (“We should live together, it will be cheaper”), RUN as fast as you can! (he’s not marriage material).
8) Thou Shalt Act Like A Lady. No cussin’, No sratchin’. No belchin’, No fartin’ and No sittin’ with your legs spread wide.
This may sound obvious, but there are many of you who does just that. Most men want their women to be refined and don’t want to hear a stream of f-words spewing from their lips.
Acting like a lady involves being polite and following common laws of courtesy, such as saying “please”, “thank you”, and “excuse me”. You must also be prompt and not make him wait no more than ten minutes for you.
9) Thou Shalt Express Sincere Interest And Appreciation. Men like genuine compliments just as much as you do (maybe even more), so don’t be afraid to tell him he’s handsome, interesting, or funny. But don’t go overboard!
Once you decide you like this guy after several dates, it’s important to show your appreciation by maybe cooking him dinner at your place.
10) Thou Shalt Not Become Intimate On The First Date. If you’re interested in him, there’s nothing wrong with a little nookie – and by that I mean hugs and kisses.
But if this one has keeper potential, it’s best to take it slow and get to know him first, for at least three months, or until in the sober light of day, he suggests a monogamous relationship.
How many times have you heard that pitiful line; “But of course, you’re the only one” while he’s frantically fumbling with your bra after one too many margaritas?
He really want to get a good look at you, in the flesh. But until you have ‘The Conversation’ about exclusivity, just assume he’s going out with other women. As a down-to-earth woman that plays No Games, you look to attract a better class of men. Want to know the secret how? This is it!
Learn how to bring out your Feminine Magnetism and attract the right man you deserve. Listen to this short sound video on “The Guy Magnet”
And by the way, as long as you are not exclusive, you have the right to date as many other men as you want. So it works both ways.
So there you have it! Just remember ladies, by following the ten commandments of dating for women, there’s a very slim chance you won’t get used and you’ll gain more awareness.
And that awareness would be focused on the actions of the prospect that you may be eyeing.
That person may have ‘flaky ways.’ Ways that somehow have you thinking, “What th’ hell…” You feel somethings up!
ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS
Here are some very important tips every woman should follow when they have doubts or suspicions about the new guy in their life. The dude actions speaks louder than words:
- Cagey About Calls. If he’s only given you a cell or office number and never calls you from home, DUMP HIM – he’s married. This also applies to the guy who only texts or emails.
(He may write you long emails, but he’ll never call you because he doesn’t want his wife to hear your conversation).
- Excessive Spontaneity. If he only calls you out of the blue and shows up at your doorstep expecting you to go somewhere with him right then and there, he is not spontaneous, he is acting like the boy next door, and will never grow up.
(You don’t have time for that kind of childishness. He’s definitely not good husband or father material).
- Substance Abuse. Be very cautions if it occurs to you that he’s drinking an awful lot of wine with dinner after he’s already had two scotches. Or if he opens a bottle of beer the second he gets home from work and goes through an entire six-pack before he goes to bed.
Worst of all, be wary if he goes to the bathroom every hour and comes back to you rubbing his nose and sniffling, or with red eyes and a silly grin on his mug.
He definitely has issues you might not be equipped to deal with. It may make you feel noble to try to help an addict, but let me tell you something healthy cannot date unhealthy.
I don’t care how much you love him, you’ve got to let him solve his problems on his own. You simply cannot be with someone who does not love himself enough to heal himself.
- Strained Family Relationships. Beware the man who hates his mother or sister(s). He’s not inclined to treat the women in his life well. And if he has issues with his dad, they’re definitely going to affect his fathering skills. Many females I know who don’t want children say it’s because their own fathers did such an awful job.
(If you don’t want children, that’s fine, but if you do, you could be heading down a one-way street to disappointment town).
- Mommy Issues. There is such a thing as a guy being too close to his family, especially to his mother. If he talks to her several times a day on the phone, and even takes her calls during your date, it’s really a bad sign.
(You will never be good enough for her son, and he will value her opinion above all others, especially yours).
- Uncontrollable Rage. Does he curse and yell in traffic? Does he use angry, foul language? Does he pound on tables and walls? Does he let other people annoy him to the extent that he gets in verbal or physical altercations?
(If so, he is not just an aggressive alpha male. He’s a jerk! Make him go away, but do it gently, in case his rage turns on you).
- Dishonesty. This could well be the most common problem of all – pay attention to the little white lies you catch him in, because they usually add up to huge whoppers. He might stretch the truth a bit in order to impress you – claiming he’s done things he hasn’t, know’s people he doesn’t, etc;
You might be tempted to let him slide, but remember, it’s all about integrity. If he’s willing to sacrifice his integrity just to impress you, that tells you just how much honesty means to him.
A liar is a liar is a liar, no matter how big or small the tales they tell, to you or anyone else. You’ll never be able to trust him!
- Egotism. This could be the second most common problem. Maybe his mother raised him to think he could do no wrong. Or perhaps he has bought into that societal crap that teaches, “Everyone’s a winner, no matter what they do!” Or it could mean that he’s just always out for himself.
Watch him closely; if he takes the best and last portions, walks in front of you, and is over -conscious of what people are saying or thinking about him, you will never be number one in his life. That space is reserved for him and him alone.
- Vanity. These dudes spend so much time working out and grooming themselves that they’re far too aware of their own looks and image. It’s embarrassing to pass a mirror with them, because they stop and stare at themselves, transfixed.
(they’ll often put other people down, making catty comments about their looks in order to feel good about themselves. Who needs the competition? dump him before the third date).
- Text & email Obsessed: Calling Makes The Man, Texting Makes The Boy, Email Makes The Phantom. If your main form of communication when you’re not together is texting, it’s a sign of immaturity, and he might not be ready for an adult relationship. Real men use their cell phones.
You understand that texting is the ‘now thing.’ (Folks rather ‘text’ now-a-day, than actually ‘talk’). But you expect the dude to call you at least, ‘Once’ over the phone. You’d like to hear his voice sometime.
You may think texting is a quicker, more efficient way to communicate, but in reality, it takes less time to dial a number and say a few words than it does to type in a message, no matter how good you are with your thumbs.
The man who texts doesn’t want to actually speak to you – he’s like the kid who just wants to poke you to let you know he’s there.
By the same token, if he’s an excessive emailer, he’s more comfortable online than in person. He’s hiding! He’s a phantom.
Now I’m not saying that you should reject a guy at the slightest hint of any of the aforementioned Danger Signs. No one’s perfect, and as you were reading through the list, you probably found yourself contemplating, “I wonder if I do that?”
But I don’t think there’s a woman out there who hasn’t suffered a bad breakup and hasn’t said something like, “I should have seen it coming – all the signs were there.”
I’m just pointing out a few warning signs you may want to heed.
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