You’re an aging, married women whose headed for divorce. Those 12 years of marriage were the worst years of your life!
Periodically, you talk with your best friend about your situation, sobbing about the marriage that went sour. Your friend, who’s a pro when it comes to dating and never married, makes you out a list of rules a woman should follow. You clip the list inside your favorite book for a future read and study of these rules. Now the ‘Ten Commandments of Dating For Women’ are put into place.
You try to prepare yourself for that inevitable divorce and then, the single world. But you’re rusty! It’s been a while since you’ve dated and you’re aware things change. You understand there are good guys and bad guys out there.
Either way, you want to do the right thing in the right way. In many situations, most women are clueless to the dating game. Many need guidance to rectify the situation.
Now as a soon to be single woman, maybe more romance would be in order.
You are new to dating and following your friends tips would be very helpful. No matter your age, race, or religion, they are set in stone just like the ones Moses received on Mount Sinai, and you break them at your own peril.
Now ladies let us begin:
1) Thou Shalt Return Calls Promptly. Return a potential’s call within 24 to 48 hours on weekdays, or 72 hours on weekends or holidays. Forget whatever Rules you’ve read, busy men get perturbed if they don’t hear back from you within that time frame.
If you’re missing each others calls, or if your text go unanswered, hear his explanation. It might be legit. But don’t complain or scold him.
2) Thou Shalt Honor Thy Dating Commitments. Nobody likes a flake. When a man you think you might be interested in musters up the courage to ask you out (and believe me, it never gets any easier for a guy, no matter how experienced he is), you must make a plain with him and stick to it.
NOTE: If you meet a man who doesn’t honor his dating commitments and is a double looker or best-offer boy, then he is not worth your time, love, or patience.
3) Thou Shalt Let The Man Take The Lead. Let him call you first. Let him ask you out first. If he’s shy, feel free to invite him to a party or a group event, but let him be the one to make the first move and suggest the first date.
Let him feel he’s cleverly tracking you by suggesting where and when your first several dates will happen. Ladies remember, if you want to be romanced, let the man lead – there’s no way around that.
If you don’t let the man lead, you’ll turn him into a couch potato.
4) In The Beginning, Thou Shalt Leave The Past In The Past. Any long talks of past marriages, old boyfriends or girlfriends is strictly taboo at first (and forever, if you can get away with it).
Men can’t help it – they will picture you naked and having sex with some other guy, and they’d really rather not go there.
5) Thou Shalt Be Engaging. Focus your attention on him – don’t let your eyes or interest wander, even if the waiter has the most adorable butt you’ve ever seen.
Let him look into those baby blues, big browns, or gorgeous greens and make sure you gaze into his and make good conversation.
Ladies, here’s a great tip! For every three questions he ask you, ask one back.
If you let the man lead the conversation and give him home-court advantage, his chest will puff up, and other organs too! If you talk 50-50, it will neutralize the sex factor, and if you talk more than he does, he’ll go to sleep.
6) Thou Shalt Not Drink Too Much On A Date. Although you might be tempted to throw back several back in an effort to relax, or maybe he’s plying you with really great wine, you want to stay clear and focused at all times (usually more than two drinks will cloud a girl’s judgement).
Besides, if it’s a really great date, you’ll want to remember every second of it.
7) Thou Shalt Not Be A Gold Digger. Don’t You DARE ask or hint for anything of monetary value!
If he offers to buy you something without so much as a hint from you, go ahead and accept it, but make sure there are no strings attached, and be ready to give it back if he starts trying to PULL those strings. If he offers you cash, however, never, I repeat, NEVER accept it.
If he offer to pay a bill you’ve been struggling with, DON’T let him do it. Besides, what do we call women who accept money from men? (what’s that garden tool called)?
This is very important: you are NOT considered a gold digger if you expect him to pay for the dates.
If he expects you to pay or split the check or talks about moving in together and splitting the rent (“We should live together, it will be cheaper”), RUN as fast as you can! (he’s not marriage material).
8) Thou Shalt Act Like A Lady. No cussin’, No sratchin’. No belchin’, No fartin’ and No sittin’ with your legs spread wide.
This may sound obvious, but there are many of you who does just that. Most men want their women to be refined and don’t want to hear a stream of f-words spewing from their lips.
Acting like a lady involves being polite and following common laws of courtesy, such as saying “please”, “thank you”, and “excuse me”. You must also be prompt and not make him wait no more than ten minutes for you.
9) Thou Shalt Express Sincere Interest And Appreciation Men like genuine compliments just as much as you do (maybe even more), so don’t be afraid to tell him he’s handsome, interesting, or funny. But don’t go overboard!
Once you decide you like this guy after several dates, it’s important to show your appreciation by maybe cooking him dinner at your place.
10) Thou Shalt Not Become Intimate On The First Date. If you’re interested in him, there’s nothing wrong with a little nookie – and by that I mean hugs and kisses.
But if this one has keeper potential, it’s best to take it slow and get to know him first, for at least three months, or until in the sober light of day, he suggests a monogamous relationship.
How many times have you heard that pitiful line; “But of course, you’re the only one” while he’s frantically fumbling with your bra after one too many margaritas?
He really want to get a good look at you, in the flesh. But until you have ‘The Conversation’ about exclusivity, just assume he’s going out with other women.
And by the way, as long as you are not exclusive, you have the right to date as many other men as you want. So it works both ways.
So there you have it! Just remember ladies, by following the ten commandments of dating for women, there’s a very slim chance you won’t get used and you’ll gain more awareness.
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