How To Stay On Her Good Side | 20 Rules Guys Should Follow With Caution

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 STAY ON A SMOOTH COURSE TO KEEP THE PEACE!

Guys, To Stay On Her Good Side Takes Much Effort.

I must start things off with a known fact: Every man who’s ever been in relationships, has found himself in the doghouse at one time or another (some more than others.) It’s an empty cold, dark, and scary place that no caring man, who tries to do the best he can, wants to venture into. So how to stay on her good side will take some effort at home.

It’s a place where one is banned to the cold shoulder, the evil eye, and the uncomfortable itchy couch. A place where there are no birds and how-to-stay-on-her-good-sidebees. No sweet music to hear!

And the sad part about it, once you’re there, it’s very hard to get out. You’re all alone!

But herein lie the age-old secrets to avoiding the doghouse – and avoiding the wrath of the lady in your life. You always want to stay on her good side.

If you pay close attention to the precepts to follow, you will find yourself armed with the knowledge you’ll need to stay out of the most ominous place in the world.

However, If I were to quote Clark Gable in “Gone with The Wind,” with his famous line; “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn”, I’d be lying. I do give a damn when it comes down to seeing guys confined to the doghouse.

Through my 37 years of marriage, I was once there myself (probably more times than I care to remember).

how-to-stay-on-her-good-side

             Bound, chained and headed for the doghouse.

Anyway, I hope this information will make you more aware of what to say, how to say it, and when.

Let’s face it guys, the complexity of a woman is a mother f____er. I wish the best to all you dudes out there who constantly screw up!

Below are 20 important rules to remember to keep your ass out of the doghouse. In other words, think of these as the most cautious things you could ever say or do in any relationship:

FOLLOW WITH CAUTION….

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RULE #1 Never forget – even her feelings have feelings.

Women feel things far more deeply than the rest of us. They can be downright bottomless wells of sensitivity. You may feel pretty happy with yourself for properly diagnosing some feeling you’ve noticed she has.

But don’t get complacent: Whatever it was, you can bet there are five more coming right behind it.

RULE #2 -Develop an attention to detail that would put Scotland Yard to shame.

Maybe she has a new haircut, some type of new hairstyle or nail color. Maybe she left for work this morning a blonde and came back a brunette. Whatever it is, if you don’t notice it, YOU’RE IN TROUBLE!

When you see her at the end of the day, play a silent round of the old children’s game What’s Wrong with This Picture? (Hint: There’s only one right answer: nothing – I love it! Even if it’s a five-engine red Mohawk.)  

RULE #3 -Learn to listen like Barbara Walters.

However long or complicated the conversation may be, just nodding your head occasionally and saying “uh huh” won’t cut the mustard. Trust me, sooner or later you’re going to need to remember what she’s saying. Pay a little attention now, and thank me later.

RULE#4 -It’s fine to have friends who are girls…as long as they all look like Mike Tyson.

Don’t expect her to be any more thrilled about your cute girl-friends than you would be about her new buddy, the hot, muscular neurosurgeon.

If you want to stay out of the doghouse, say goodbye to all lady friends who have more than one facial tattoo and less than three chins.

RULE#5 -Learn when a request is actually a command in disguise.

“Do you want to come with me to the kids’ play?” “Do you feel like going to the school board meeting?” “To see the Robertson’s baby?” “To the Johnson’s housewarming?”  These sound like request…. but there NOT!

RULE#6 -Just as in any other penal system, repeat offenders get longer sentences.

You’re probably thinking everyone makes a mistake once in a while. That would be your FIRST mistake. Justice might be blind, but she has a perfect memory.

Even if you throw yourself on the mercy of the court and get a suspended sentence for your first offense, the second time the judge will throw the book at you.

RULE#7 -Take a lesson from golf: Always keep your head down.

One of the quickest paths to the doghouse is getting caught looking at other women. Even when you think you’re in the clear, You’re NOT! Women all have that sixth sense.

When you feel temptation is near, keep your head down and stare at your feet. If that’s too hard, think about investing in a pair of horse blinders.

RULE#8 -Even if she asks for details about your ex-girlfriends, she doesn’t really want to know.

No good ever comes from talking about ex-girlfriends. Bringing them up is like summoning a ghost – once in the room, they’ll haunt you forever. We recommend telling her you spent spent most of your life in a seminary before you met.


RULE#9 -Your relationship is not an adult film…it’s a sitcom!

We know, you may have seen some things online that looked pretty…stimulating. Unless you’re a rock star, though, don’t even try talking her into trying anything you’ve seen in dirty movies.

Trust me: your relationship’s more like ‘Everybody Loves Raymond’, without the joke writers. the laugh track or the commercial breaks.

RULE#10 -Learn from our old past, former president Nixon: The cover-up is always worse than the crime.

Deleted text messages are as bad as incriminating texts. If you wouldn’t want her to read it, don’t send it in the first place – ’cause she will, every time. And mobile reception in the doghouse is terrible.

 RULE#11 -Never use any kind of fruit to describe the shape of her body. Fruit can be very good for you. Fruit metaphors? Not so much. Pear, apple, melon, cantaloupe – reach for the wrong image, and you might get that same piece of fruit thrown at your head.

RULE#12 -There’s NO A for effort.

Sorry, but if she ask for a cucumber and you come up with a zucchini, you’re in trouble! “Some kind of vegetable” isn’t enough to keep your head above water.

RULE#13 -Fair: A place with cotton candy and pony rides.

Get use to it: When it comes to relationships, life isn’t fair. If you want to ‘win’ her, every so often you need to lose an argument. Check your ego at the door – and your superego and your id, while you’re at it.

RULE#14 -Begging is far more effective than facts, logic, and rational thought.

You may brandish “the facts” like a seasoned lawyer – but this is not a court of law. In an argument, logic will only make her more irate. Think less like a lawyer and more like a prisoner on a pirate ship: When all else fails, – “beg for mercy.”

RULE#15 – There’s NO such thing as a friendly game of “What celebrity would you sleep with?”

Dude, you really ought to know better, but one or two glasses of wine and a shot of vodka and there you are, revealing your secret yearning to make out with Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Lopez. Innocent enough, right?

RULE#16 – NEVER side with your mother over her (unless you want to move back in with mom).

True. For the first eighteen years of your life, your mother’s opinion was the one that counted. But now there’s a new sheriff in town!

Tell her your mom disagree with her, and you and your poor mom could get get thrown in the stir.

RULE#17 – No good can come of forming a band AFTER the age of twenty – nine. 

From where she stands, forming a band can only lead to bad things: Your being gone nights on end, wearing childish T-shirts, and coming home to a cold dinner and a cold shoulder. Try it, and your ‘opening night’ may be at a little club, down the end of a deserted road called “the Doghouse.”

RULE#18 – Don’t Complain about your plate unless you want it replaced by a bowl. 

Unless the steak she serves you is extra rare with a side of E. coli. it’s Best NOT to criticize her cooking. Remember, before she came along you were probably eating frozen dinners everyday. So whatever she’s got cooking, it’s an upgrade!

RULE#19 – A woman’s pet is never just an animal. It’s her furry soulmate. 

They’re all dog and cat whisperers. Don’t assume you can make fun of her cat or yell at her dog. She’d probably sacrifice her life – or yours, at least – for the animals.

And now, before I end, here’s one more extreme rule that targets ALL married guys. I’ll call this “The Grand Daddy of All Rules” (It stands alone in the rankings): 

RULE#20 – “Your Wedding Ring Should Only Leave Your finger, If Your Finger Leaves Your Hand.”

To the numerous fellows that ended up in the doghouse after getting caught taking off their ring on the way to a bar, stripclub, or some other hunting ground or watering hole, will always remember the day. A woman figure once that ring goes on your finger, the only things with a license to remove it are a wood chipper, meat cleaver…or an alligator.

So there you have it, fellas. Follow these 20 important rules! Hopefully, you’ll try to stay on her good side. It’ll keep your ass out of the doghouse! Good luck!

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(Also, see What Men Hate Most About Women)

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Editor’s Note: This post was originally published on March 10, 2017 and has been completely revamped and updated for accuracy and comprehensiveness.


Ronald Kennedy

Comedy writer, cartoonist and singer. Attended the Art institute of Chicago in 1980. Graduated from Malcolm X in 2000 with an associate's degree in applied science. Been working online since 2004

134 Comments:

  1. Thank you for the excellent article! I think I will print it out and add to all the possible places in our house so my husband knows the rules by heart 🙂 With a light touch of humor yet very meaningful and correct piece of information every man should know!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thank you for commenting Arta. I’m glad you found a lot of value in my article. it’s great that I can help both sexes through this post. I know as men, we’re not perfect, and I know we don’t pretend we are (maybe some do think they’re perfect…and those are the one’s who end up in their woman’s doghouse).

      Arta, go easy on your husband. I know he means well, but as men, we do slip from time to time. But with these rules, this will help guys to straighten up and fly right. They’ll thank me later.

      Again, thank you for commenting and let me know if I can do anything else for you.

  2. First, I have to applaud you on your 37 years of marriage. Bravo! Talk about credibility. It’s obvious that you speak from years of experience. Very few people come even close to that. I really like the simple point you made about not forgetting. Isn’t it crazy that such a simple act can show so much in the eyes of your partner? Great article.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Eric and thanks for commenting and Thank you. Yes, 37 years ain’t No joke! But any guy can get through this, (just keep around plenty of containers of Tylenol in the medicine cabinet and fifths of Vodka on hand). LOL. But all was good. Unfortunately, she was very ill over the past several years and died July, 2015. As far as staying out of the doghouse myself, It was a struggle. I had my share of visits, that’s why I wanted to give others a ‘heads up’.

      Guys should keep a sharp mind and clear head when it comes down to keeping the peace in your relationship. You never know sometimes, where your woman is coming from. She’ll come out of a bag on you and have you thinking quickly. Just stay on your toes!

      Thanks again Eric for dropping in. Let me know if you have any other questions or concerns.

  3. It’s sad. I read this and I feel sad. But it’s real. We do feel mad but it’s not the thing itself but the reasons behind the less than ideal actions that make us angry.

    For example, the part about it is not a request? It’s not about whether you have to go or not. A guy’s no tells a woman she and the kids aren’t top priority. If he has no good reason to say no, and prefers to stay home to, say, play computer games instead, he’s in big trouble because he is saying that the computer games and wasting at home is more important than her.

    For me, I’m really torn in such instances–talk about having many feelings! I actually believe that a guy needs his own free time, but if he does his own thing most of the time, BOOM! Time for him to have a reality check especially if he is married.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Regina and thanks for giving me a woman’s point of view on this. I expect women who’d comment to my article would have strong opinions to certain ‘rules’ listed, but hey, I love stirring up shit regarding both sexes.This is what makes communication exciting. But in any of my writings, I just call it the way I see it. (Not to mention 37 years of marriage to boot).

      I know you speak for most women when you stated the real reason a guy would wanna stay hope. That video game is top priority as opposed to the wife and kids topping the list. Those guys should just be up front and honest, hoping she’ll understand. But this is where things get a bit shaky. Maybe some women may understand, maybe some won’t. All depends on that person!

      So Regina, how do you feel in regards to understanding certain men’s actions? Based on your reply, It sounds like you don’t give men much slack. I’ll bet the ‘free time’ you’d give your man is determined and based on ‘your clock’ and not his! Right?

      Regina, I really appreciate you checking in with me and commenting.

  4. Hahaha the article sure made me laugh! You write in such chill and humorous style!

    Although I must agree that in most of families women seem to be the “head” of the family, however I often come across really awesome ladies with great personalities and happy, relaxed husbands. I guess it differs per family.

    I find it a bit sad how women in this article are described as some soulless, selfish tyrants. I get it that there are people who live by “My way or no way!” rule, but there are also extremely kind and non dramatic ladies out there!

    I believe that if a person is feeling chained or not happy with his life, he should simply move on and enjoy life, instead of sitting in the dark place, complaining about his wife and being miserable for the rest of his life. Don’t you agree?

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Angie, and thank you for commenting. Yes, I do agree, especially with the last part of what you said. You would think that most guys, whose not happy in their current relationship, would just ‘walk’. But I think that many have been on ‘lock down’ for so long on the relationship, they put up with whatever is thrown their way.

      ‘Wimps?’ Maybe. ‘Just trying to keep the peace?’ Perhaps. Who can say what holds people relationships together? I know all women are not the same when it comes to keeping the home running smoothly. Many ladies rule with an ‘Iron Hand’ and many others may not give a crap! (these are the signs that your relationship is sinking faster than the Titanic).

      So before many upset women start setting fire to my post, I’m just saying all are not alike. Many different personalities floating around out there. Sweet and sour in all. It’s just a matter of finding the right one to deal with. But you really won’t know until you start dealing with each other. Right Angie?

  5. Great article Ronald. Humorous but filled with golden nuggets of wisdom on how to deal with women. Frankly speaking, I’ve been guilty of all these (with different women of course lol!) And know how bad the repercussions can be.

    This will be my go to reminder on how to deal with women. Just like you said, we can never be complacent =)

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thank you Isaac. I appreciate you commenting. it always make me feel good when I can post articles which provide my readers with value. Something they can take to heart, and maybe get a good chuckle out of it as well. I love writing and posting good humorous material. I agree Isaac, there’s ‘gold in them there hills.’ These are rules guys should live by.

      As men, I’m sure there are many on this list we have broken. We ain’t perfect (although some women try to make us that way according to their taste), but we know there’s that visit to the dog house coming. (Oh well, what are we gonna do?) Isaac, print this out and tape it to the fridge.

      Thank you again for commenting. Let me know if I can help you with anything else.

  6. This was a little funny but an interesting read. I do think whatever you have mentioned here in the post are absolutely right! On point!
    I think the best part was where you mentioned to notice the changes in her and even when you recommend that men should listen else they could get into trouble. Oh yes, and the girl friends who look like Mike Tyson! Well written!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi shrey and thank you for commenting. I know that article opened many eyeballs, men and women. When it comes down to serious relationships, sometime men seem to take their woman for granted. They don’t respect them enough. It’s goes like this; (Man) “Hey honey, I’m gonna run down to the corner to buy some smokes and beer.” (Woman) “Hurry back. Dinners almost done!” (Man…6 hours later,) “I decided at the last minute, to volunteer at the soup kitchen, that’s why I’m a little late.” (Woman…Pissed for days) “Well, I hope there’s room and board at that kitchen ’cause that’s your new home.”

      Maybe the scenario may not be exactly like that, but you get the picture. There has to be some level of honesty, caring and commitment. Like I pointed out in my article, a woman would feel more confident within herself knowing that her mans ex looks like Ernest Borgnine. Guys in trouble, have to understand that begging is far more effective than facts, logic, and rational thought.

      Thank you shrey for checking in. Let me know if I can help you with anything else.

  7. theceoinslippers

    Rule number four is so true. I have no friends that are women for a couple of reasons. One- I don’t want anyone in my life but my wife as it is. Two- My wife is gorgeous and I am lucky to have her as my wife. Three- No Doghouse could be big enough for me if I had a friend who was a women unless she looked like Mike Tyson . I ditched all my female friends when I got married because I am focused on her. This was a good read. Thanks.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thank you my friend for checking in. These rules are definitely something the married guy or soon-to-be-married guy should pay close attention to. By tossing these rules to the side and then venturing out to do your own thing, will be the equivalent of walking barefooted across a bed of hot coals. You’ll feel the heat and pressure from your spouse or soon to be spouse, and end up most of the time, in a place you don’t wanna be.

      Anyone who reads the list, would pick out their favorite! They probably been there, done that, and don’t wanna go down that road again. I see you picked out your favorite rule. It sounds as though you’ve got your relationship together.

      It’s great that you have a fantastic marriage with an incredible, gorgeous wife. (Hey, you must be doing something right). Good for you. Many others should follow your advice.

      When I think about rule #3, many women will relax on this one and give let their men all the social freedom they want. (when you have an ex that look like tyson, you carry No Fear of competition). UGH!!

      Thanks again my friend for checking in. Let me know if I can help you with anything else.

  8. th3Invisibl3man

    Great article about how a man like me should behave and remembering the rules. I think I shouldn’t expose this page to my wife though as I may be skipping some of the rules at times. I particularly agree or like rule #16 though. But I’ll be the dominant and side the fact and rationality than either party.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi invisible3man

       How are you? Glad you enjoyed my article. I got a kick out of writing it.These steps are designed especially to keep all us good guys on the straight and narrow. Steps we must and should abide by.

      You made a good point by saying you don’t want to show this to your wife. I guess most women would just add another rule that we’d have to follow. (uh oh…more rules for us)

      As men we think we know it all. (It’s just are nature) Sometimes we may be right, but, (and I hate to say this) most of the time we’re wrong. We try to do the right things. When she’s mad, we bring the flowers, candy, send the little sweet cards, offer to dine out at the nicest places, etc;

      Regardless of what we do, we are headed to the doghouse because of some little boneheaded remark we made, something we did (or didn’t do), or forgetting a certain date. You mentioned rule#16, that one involves mom. You NEVER want to compare her to your mom, in a negative way. If you do, just grab the keys and lock yourself in the ‘Doghouse’.

      Thanks again for commenting my friend. Let me know if I can do anything else for you.  

  9. Hahaha! This post is not only seriously funny, it is tremendously accurate. I’ve been married for 17 years and these things are so true. As we get older, the “trueness” of them also becomes humorous. You’ve highlighted that nicely throughout your post. Thank you for a great laugh! I have to send this to my mother-in-law!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Randene. Thank you for checking in and commenting. I’m glad you got a ‘kick’ out of this article. It gave me a good laugh as I was creating the site. Just thinking over the years, all the rules and order, us guys must follow. As men, we try our best to please our ladies, but most of the time it stems from an incident we just can’t get out of. Maybe we threw out some stupid lie and naturally; we wind up in ‘the doghouse.’

      You mentioned the number of years you’ve been married, so I know your husband has hit the doghouse a few times. (Mine was 37 years, I don’t have to tell you how many times I hit that dreaded place). LOL.

      As you mentioned the longer the relationship goes, we find ourselves thinking about all the craziness we’ve been through. All we can do is laugh. Randene, if you like to see some crazy profiles of potential mates that you could’ve ran across in the past (but thank God you didn’t), then prepare your funny bone for this, “How To Select A Compatible Mate (The singles quick reference guide)”

      Please share this article and ‘How to Select a Compatible Mate’ on social media, family and any other outlets. Thanks for checking in. Let me know if you have any questions about anything.                           

  10. You just hit the nail on the head mate,

    My woman was going on and on about her new job and how disgusting it was but I didn’t pay full attention to what she was saying.

    Then she mentioned something that I found interesting and I had to ask her a question out of curiosity.

    Guess what? She hasn’t talked to me for 2 days now. She had already told me what i wanted to know but i was not paying attention.

    I have now learnt to listen the hard way.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thanks Dave for stopping by to comment. I try being as thorough as I can when it comes down to identifying  what ‘ticks’ these ladies off. Dave, as men, sometime we just can’t win. We think we’re doing the right thing (depending on the situation, that is), then low and behold, there we are, grabbing our blankets and heading for ‘the doghouse.’

      Dave, you committed one of the worse crimes in a relationship. A cardinal sin! Not listening is one of the worse offenses that top the charts (you would’ve gotten a lighter sentence if you had robbed a bank!)LOL. You know you’re in deep do-do when they come back and ask a question, and you don’t give the answer they’re expected to hear.

      Dave, You have to really understand women. No questions about it! See my article ‘Do Men Really Understand Women? Read that article and grasp its concept. Get back with me and let me know what you think. With women, it seems you can’t live with them and you can’t live without them.

      Thanks again for checking in Dave. Please let me know if I can help you with anything else.

       

  11. Ronald I love this article. Your sense of humour had me chuckling throughout.

    As a woman I was curious to hear a male point of view on these points.

    I guess Men really are from Mars and Women really are from Venus in that we are different species – which means we are attracted to each other and equally confused by each other.

    Now off to read What Men Hate Most about Women!

    Thanks again!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hello Fleur, how are you? Thanks for checking in and commenting. I’m also thrilled that you enjoyed my article and found some value in it. I try to write dealing with the reality of a subject, and at the same time give it a splash of humor. I love comedy and if you go through any of my other articles you’ll find most of them pretty humorous.

      I like to write on things that touches on the demeanor and personalities of both sexes. No one way is right! There’s differences of opinions on both sides. But in this case, us guys should know where to draw the line (at least, you’d think we would know). For some of us dudes, it takes a little time for things to sink into our brain cells.

      Fleur, we know, by then it’s too late to turn things around. (All we can do is march ourselves right down to the ‘doghouse’). As far as men & women relationships goes, there’s a constant ‘head-bumping’. You’d thing we all are from different planets. But the way a typical man would think about a woman is; “Hey, You can’t live with them, and can’t live without them.” Case Closed!

      Fluer, thanks again for commenting and continue reading through my other articles. (Let me know what you think of “What men hate most about women.”) You’ll find it very interesting and entertaining. Also Fluer, please share this article on your social media page and let me know if I can do anything else for you. 

  12. where’s the equality?
    At what point does the man stand up for himself, grow a backbone and contribute the relationship.
    Women these days aren’t looking for meer puddle of a man.
    No marriage should ever be compared to a penal system.
    A man living like a slave to a woman is no way to live.
    The man won’t be happy and neither will the woman.
    My two cents worth, work on your self confidence, build your own identify, independent of your wife and fight for your own existence. Don’t be ashamed of yourself. Go your own way.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Remy. Thanks for checking in with me and voicing your comments. Remy, by the tone of your letter (and I assume you’re a male), it seems to me you speak from experience. If you have, I’ll bet the house that you bailed out of that relationship quick! I can tell you tried to make it work but it just wasn’t meant to be. 

      You’re right to feel there should be some type of equality in regards to any relationship. But some women like that feeling of ‘power’ and ‘control’ over their men. They know they have a man that can be ruled over and it turn, some men do what their woman say, just to keep the peace.

      But in most cases, it’s really not a matter of the man having ‘backbone’, I think it boarders more on the man going along with the program, trying to keep the peace at home and restraining himself from knocking her ass out! (…sorry; got a little carried away on that last remark!) 

      But, at any rate like you say, it should be peace and understanding on both sides to keep harmony in the household. It’s the only way things will work!

      Thanks again for dropping by, my friend. Please let me know if you have any other comments, questions or concerns.

       

  13. I had a pretty good laugh reading this! Everything that you list is 100% true. I have only been married for 6 years but whether its been a short or long marriage they all still hold true. #13… how to lose an argument is still a tough one for me to grasp. I just can’t seem to help myself even though it would be in my best interest to do just that. I really enjoyed reading through your list here. Thanks for the good read!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Nate, thank you for checking in with me and commenting. As I was putting this article together, I got a pretty good laugh myself. I love writing and drawing comedy, with a mixture of reality. Something we all can relate to.

      As we go through life, in and out of relationships, we try to learn and understand about our significant other. But you really never know about a person until you start living together. As men, we try to take so much just to keep the peace. But then we can only take so much.

      As you mentioned,100% truth lies in this list. This is the list of guidelines women love for us to follow. (but we are not designed to be ‘followers’) That’s why most relationships won’t work. It should be understanding among both parties. Yes Nate, I’ll agree. That #13 is a mother f_____! Ain’t to many dudes out here willing to give into these arguments too quickly. 

      Nate, if you feel this article can help others, please blast it out on your social media pages, (FB, Twitter, instagram) Thanks again for checking in with me. Please et me know if I can assist you further.

  14. Thank you for the brilliant and lovely article about rules. I am thinking to take print out all of these rules and put it in everywhere in the house so all of may family will read it and follow it. As it is harmony and filled with a lot of golden wisdom!

    Really thank you for the wonderful and enjoyable article.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi haitham, thank you for commenting. Glad you enjoyed it. I also got a big kick putting it together. When I write my post, I always instill an element of humor regardless of how serious the subject is. Just like the rules I posted, they all hold truth, But at the same time, they’re designed to give folks a good chuckle as they read forward.

      My friend, I think that’s a clever idea to have a bunch of printed rules around the house. But be careful.This will make the women of your home feel more powerful and hold you to these rules. And my friend haitham, remember if you don’t abide by the rules, you and any men in your home will end up in the doghouse. (So get the blanket and pillow ready).

      Also haitham do me a favor. As long as you’re spreading this info around the house, share this article and my URL on your social media pages. I know many others will get a kick out of reading this and sharing on their page.

      Again my friend haitham, i want to thank you for dropping by. Let me know if I can do anything else for you. 

  15. Man!
    Are we women this bad? i don’t know…you know I am a woman so my first reaction was to get slightly offended, then slightly amused ahaha! Cause after reading for a while, I can totally relate to all the things you wrote. We really are a piece of art, aren’t we? You guys are more simple, I know. So simple, sometimes we don’t get you how you can be so simple. But, dude, this article is really good and it put a grin on my face. I have also forwarded it to my boyfriend and asked him “Do you relate?”. I think this is really good advice for man. Really. Follow these steps and you won’t be sent to the doghouse aha! Well, not likely at least, but you never know 😉
    Thanks for the article,
    Mia

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Mia, how are you? Thank you for checking in and commenting to my post. Now Mia, before you place me blindfolded in front of a firing squad, let me clear things up a bit. Let me tell you first hand that I love the ladies and would never place them in a bad light. I can’t say all women are characterized and portrayed as controlling creatures that I wrote about, BUT there are many in our crazy society that ‘fits the bill.’

      As you stated yourself Mia, although you have an innocent and pretty face, you can relate to some of the things I listed. (I like to instill humor in all my writings,and at the same time, keep it on a serious note). Yes Mia, I know you’d think the natural thing to do is put your boyfriend ‘in check’. You know if he step out of line, you’d escort him to ‘the doghouse.’

      We, as guys, will do (within reason) what you ladies tell us, just to keep the peace! I’m not saying we’re ‘wimps’, but again, just to keep the arguing down and to stay out of the doghouse, we’ll oblige. Mia, show this to your boyfriend and get back with me, to let me know what he said. Also, share this article with your girlfriends.

      I’m sure most guys, after reading this, will say, “Damn, that Ron dude hit the nail on the head. Most women ARE crazy!” LOL…..again Mia, just joking! As they say, Women. You can’t live with ’em, Can’t live without ’em!

      I want to thank you for stopping by Mia my friend. Let me know if I can do anything else for you.

       

  16. Was that you in the video? You look so young to married for 37 years haha. Major props though. The Mike Tyson line got me. It does stem from insecurity but its totally normal for everyone to feel jealous by a partner’s attractive friend and that goes both ways. I can’t comprehend whats it like to be in relationship for that long so I don’t know that reality YET.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Arian, how are you? Sorry for the delay in responding. I was busy taking care of business. (Not the business of seeking a woman, but other stuff never the less). LOL. I don’t know who’s that dude in the video, but I did look like that in my younger years. I always thought of myself as a ‘Ladies Man.’ Had many honey’s back in the day!

      Yes Arian, 37 years of marriage is something else. I guess you can say it’s a mini-mildstone. I think about the couples who made it 55 – 60 years. Wow! Give them a medal! If a couple can stand each other all those years, hey more power to them. But trust and honesty really plays a strong part.

      Yes, that Mike Tyson line gave me a laugh as I wrote it. (Ugh, just the thought of a woman looking like Mike Tyson give me the shivers!!) Yes, I agree insecurities make a lot of folks act funny to the point of being so over- bearing and over-protective they drive their spouse away. Attitudes have got to change among both parties.

      Love, dating and relationships sometime sends your mind on a roller coaster. Your relationship goes up and down! Whenever you find yourself in a long term relationship, who knows Arian, you may go through 37 years like nothing. Lol.

      Thanks again my friend, for stopping by. Let me know if I can help you with anything else.

  17. Interesting take on a very important subject, Ronald. I think I’d agree with all of them… EXCEPT the “forming a band” one. I’ve been a musician my whole life so forming a band in my life is as frequent as taking vacations. Mostly they’re one-offs for certain events, but still!

    I thought it was funny when you mentioned what to do when our significant other “asks” about a former girlfriend. I can tell you, bro… my girl has NEVER asked. She doesn’t want to know. Period. And not hear about it either! lol

    Keep up the love talk. One of my desert island discs is Stephen Bishop’s “On and On” record. Maybe you can use that as a soundtrack here. lol

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi TJ thank you for stopping by and commenting. Really appreciate it and glad you found my site interesting. I know there’s a lot of readers who may or may not agree with the things I have listed.

      TJ, you mentioned the one about ‘forming a band.’ Besides being a writer, I too am a singer as well (my other two brothers are also singers and song writers). I know you love music just as much as I do. But having a woman trying to control that aspect of my life, then all I can say is, “Nah baby, aint gonna happen”. I love my music too much. There are many guys out there ‘still rocking’ past the age of twenty nine. But to keep the peace (and the woman) at home, I guess you do what you gotta do.

      I guess I was lucky, when we were dating, then married, my wife enjoyed coming to shows seeing me perform. No problem. And the part about the ‘other woman in your past’ I find some women may want to know how the relationship was with the other person. 

      I personally think of this as a ‘trap.’ Just think TJ, women only ask this question when their bored, want to be nosy all of a sudden and then later want to start some shit! I recommend guys, don’t fall for this. There will NEVER be a ‘correct’ answer.

      You have a smart lady TJ. she knows how to keep possible friction from brewing. Why start trouble? You’re a lucky guy, my man! I always feel there’s ‘good’ and ‘bad’ in all relationships. It’s all about working together, being honest and good communication. The ‘LOVE DOCTOR’ has spoken! lol.

      Thanks TJ, for commenting. Let me know if I can do anything else for you.

  18. This is very well written. Well it isn’t that dramatic and I think some relationships are more prone to be a “dog house” relationships than others. Having said that your suggestions make sense as a guidance for good order in the house. I like point 5 where a question is not really a question but a command in disguise. I think that if there are expectations in the relationship then that would be the case
    All the points you write, make sense but not all are relevant.
    Cheers

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Orion, my friend. Thank you for dropping in and commenting. I appreciate the compliment. Now as soon as I unshackle my feet and hands, then I’ll be ready to reply. LOL. No Orion, I’m not in the doghouse. I have no one living here with me, to put me in one. (my wife passed away over 2 years ago).

      But when we were living here together as a family, I had my share of visits to the doghouse. I feel most guys have been there more times than they care to remember. You pointed out ‘Rule #5’ regarding commands. I feel it’s how the spouse ‘speak in tone’ when asking you what to do. It’s all about how it comes across.

      I think all these rules hit home. Some may ‘hit home’ harder than others. I know I can’t speak for all guys out there, but all I know is that good communication among all parties involved, will keep ‘the doghouse’ unoccupied for a while. (To keep the peace, sometimes we have to ‘fly the straight and narrow.’ Everything will work out in the long run.

      Thank you Orion for stopping by to comment. Let me know if I can do anything else for you.

  19. As a female, I found this post hilariously true. In fact, I am considering having my fiance read it when he gets home from work tonight!

    I love the flow of the post, and how you tie everything together do nicely with the images.

    Overall, awesome post! I believe every part of it was true! Keep up the great work! 🙂

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi femSmoker, nice to hear from you again. Glad you found some value in my post. Although these rules aren’t ‘set in stone’, so to speak, but they are at a good starting point for you ladies to lay on us poor guys. lol. 

      I know I can’t speak for all guys out there, but I know most of us do our best to make our woman happy. And on the other hand, I got a pretty clear understanding on how you all think and what ya’ll expect from us.

      We, as men, at least make an attempt to do what’s right regardless of ho awkward it makes us feel. Hey’ we’re not perfect, but we try our best. Yes, show this to your fiance and let me know his opinion on some of these rules. (An interesting topic to discuss). I’m glad you got a good laugh out of it. Stand By FemSmoker! More juicy stuff is yet to come!

       

  20. Thanks for this article. It made my day. I actually have been married longer than 37 years and found your tips to be wonderful. I said, “That’s right!” quite a few times as I read. I particularly like the advise not to use fruit as a comparison. I sent the link to your article to my sons – all five of them.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi my friend Anast. Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate it. I’m so glad it made your day! Any couple that can put some long years into their marriage, is a good thing. (A lot of couples don’t even make it nowhere that long). Congrats to you for you and your spouse for still hanging in there with each other, Many more long & healthy years to you both.

      I know that many people that read my article related to it quite well; along with a good laugh to boot. I guess right away, they saw themselves or even someone they know in this writing. We aren’t always perfect, and men shouldn’t make that claim, because the minute they do that’s when they slip. (I guess no ones perfect)!

      I’m glad you shared this with all your sons. I guess they’ve all been involved in long term relationships. With them reading this, it will help them in their relationship in regards to knowing ‘how to stay on her good side.’ (Keep in touch, my friend. Let me know what their thoughts were on these rules).

  21. Oh wait, only 17?! Just kidding. Good advice for men who tend not to think and act in ways women can relate to. As a woman, I get it that men tend in general to think linearly, while women think in multi-circles and planes, but you cannot change the way the brain works. Some practical advice to help bridge the difference is great!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Annie, and thanks for stopping in. Glad you found this advice to be helpful to those needing it the most. As men, sometimes we may think we got it altogether, only to be bought down to our knees by a smart-thinking woman wanting to do things another way.

      I probably could have gone on and on listing more rules, but I know my fingers would have eventually gave out! lol. (I think you get the picture).

      I agree with you in regards to the different behavioral brain patterns among the sexes. Everyone is unique in his and her own way! But some men can’t be changed; therefore the unacceptable behavioral problem still exist in the home. The main problem I see is ‘not thinking before you speak or act!’ Once this feat is mastered, things will go more smoothly and issues will work out themselves.

  22. Thanks a lot for this website overall all the articles seem pretty interesting, on top of that everyone is naturally interested in the topic love, one of the 17 rules that got to me was talking about my ex to my new girl I didn’t know it was such a big deal when I would never even think on getting back with her, anyhow I guess its just a girl thing. Thank you for the great advice.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Erik, and thanks for checking in with me. Really appreciate your visit. True love, along with honest and all the other juicy stuff that goes with it, is something folks try to accomplish in their search. Many seek out love in all the wrong places! Some guys search out here and still don’t know what the hell they want. (I have a personal friend that fits this bill!)

      The 17 rules were created to give guys a ‘head start’ coming out the gates! They know what potentially would happen if they screw up. Most men who really love their women and know their women love them, don’t really worry about that because of true commitments on both sides.

      On rule #8 where guys blab to their woman about past loves, you’d be surprised how many guys make this ‘boneheaded’ mistake. Also, I must point out that these relationships are usually rocky from the start and don’t last. In reality, what the guy is doing is sending out a signal to his woman that he can still get any woman he choose  

      In these dudes minds, by saying things like “Hey, my ex would’ve done this or that, she used to do this with me or she’d let me do that” etc; it makes them feel macho and such a ‘ladies man’ that they’re telling their woman, “hey watch your step. Allow me my space,” These are the ‘True’ losers in life!

  23. I agree with a ton of stuff in this post. When a woman asks a man to tell her about his past relationships, she really doesn’t want to hear the whole story. One other tip regarding that: Don’t bad mouth the other women you dated.

    While it is never OK to flat out lie to your woman, omitting certain details that were not asked for explicitly is definitely the way to go. Why divulge a bunch of details that are only going to make her more angry?

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Ernest, thank you for checking in with me. Yes Ernest, that last part of your letter hit the nail on the head and said it all! I definitely agree that you can’t be too open to these chicks out here because what you say may incriminate you. Lock you up in the doghouse ‘for life’. lol.

      In regards to the part about women don’t wanna hear the whole story and don’t bad mouth the ex, is something in the past, that went against me. I was married twice. I told my second wife too many details about my first wife while we were dating.

      Quite frankly Ernest, she didn’t mind listening because I didn’t know that in her mind, she was dissecting pieces out of the conversation that would work in her favor. So I guess it really boils down to the type of woman and what their future game plan will be. (…oh, and by the way, her game plan worked. We were married for 37 years) I’m a widower now, but still in the dating game and a lot more wiser!

      But normally, as you mentioned, you don’t want to say too much that will piss her off and land you in the ‘dog house.’ 

  24. Haha… This post is funny but true. I think that the most important rule for me is listening (and, by extension, remembering). It definitely bothers me when my boyfriend doesn’t seem to pay attention. I think that what complicated this is that different things will be important to different women.

    I will also say that this article is a reminder to be a little more chill. I really don’t want for my boyfriend to feel like he is walking on eggshells around me!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hello again my friend. I’m glad you got a kick from my humorous article. There’s definitely a lot of truth displayed here that make guys walk a thin line. It mostly give them something to think about. As you mentioned, the rule regarding that us guys don’t listen seems to be one that rates near the top.

      But all dudes aren’t the same. (Hey…I listen; at least to what I wanna hear!)lol. But at any rate, all rules are meant to be broken. In this writing, I don’t want it to appear that I’m saying all women are controlling tyrants and guys are wimps. It’s just that, depending on the type of woman, guys end up in the ‘dog house’ sometime over the smallest thing. 

      Now asmithxu, your boyfriend’s inability to communicate really doesn’t mean he’s not paying attention. You may be talking to him at the wrong time….. when he’s watching sports! College basketball, March Madness!!LOL

  25. As a female, I MUST agree with Rule No. 16, if I can only choose to uphold one rule amongst all that you have listed.

    Yep, I don’t even give a damn if he takes off the wedding ring. After all, I can always take off mine too 😛

    But if he ever sides his mom over me, especially about private matters that should not involve our parents, then I think it’s better to end the relationship. Being too depending on parents = too immature to start a new family and have children, at least in my eyes.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Whoa, slow down Rachel. Although i’m a guy, I feel where you’re coming from! In regards to him siding with his mom over you is a ‘dangerous move’ that probably wouldn’t be tolerated by any woman. (I call this the ‘mama’s boy’ syndrome).

      Any guy that dare to pull this move is looking to getting his ass kicked. When it’s all said and done, they wind up in the ‘dog house.’ Can’t blame no one but themselves! And when it comes down to slipping off that ring in the car before hitting the clubs, seem to be a move that’s been around forever.

      It never gets old! If a dude can get away with it, and most do, then they’ll always be infidelity flying around among relationships with ‘no end in sight.’

  26. It’s great that you share and acknowledge the deep beauty that lies in a woman’s unpredictable feelings. Even fellow women sometimes have trouble understanding them. They key definitely lies in listening observing, and communicating well. You give some good advice here. I’d only add that women can be just as confused by men at times and would fair well to apply similar advice.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Yes Jamie, as they say; there’s “two sides to every story.” How truthful those sides are is a different story. As far as confusion goes, that happens within both sexes. Sometimes guys do all they can, feeling it’s the right thing, and still end up ‘in the doghouse.’ Some women are just hard to please and regardless of what guys do, they still end up ‘shits creek.’ without a paddle. Only time will tell who’s right or who’s wrong.

  27. Hey RJ!

    Great article! I’ve found open communication in my relationship to be key to staying out of the doghouse, but your point about avoiding complacency cannot be taken lightly.

    Listening, paying attention to detail, and recognizing those questions that are actually ‘commands’ (although I don’t like this term because I don’t believe either party should be commanding the other in a healthy relationship) are the most important keys you offer, in my mind.

    Thanks for helping us guys stay in good standing with our ladies and out of the doghouse!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      You’re welcome Tucker. Glad you found some value in my site. I try my best to guide us down the correct path that will keep the peace and our butts out of the doghouse. But as much as we try, we seem to end up there anyway. When a couple is open with each other and honesty and trust is displayed, then there is no need to worry about heading ‘to the doghouse.’ To make it all work, couples have to be on the same page.

  28. You’re right about a lot of things. I love the eleven, btw. It made me laugh so hard.
    I want to add something, though. If she knows you really care about her, she doesn’t mind if you look at others. She does it too. The problem is when she believes you are going to act on it.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      I think I speak for most guys when I say we have to walk around ‘on eggshells’ and watch what comes out of our mouths to stay out of trouble. As hard as we try, we always tend to say something stupid. (…yes, the11th rule). But a good point you bought up regarding a ‘wandering eye.’ If one can do it, the other can too. As long as each other don’t act on their impulses.

  29. As woman reading this, I found it pretty funny because it is true. Rule #3 used to get my husband in trouble a lot. Later I would mention to him something about that was said in our previous conversation and he would look lost and I hit him with “See, you never listen to me.” He’s learned though. Now, even when he doesn’t look like he’s paying attention, he is, and I’ve given him a little more slack because I trust that he always is. Rule #4 is a must plus “No new friends!” Thanks for the great read. I’m definitely passing this on to my husband.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Evette and thanks for checking in with me. After your husband read this, it should make him ‘straighten up and fly right’. As a guy I’ll admit in the past, I wasn’t perfect ether. As I was putting these rules together, I thought to myself. “Boy! I screwed up Big Time back in the day!” I guess through past experience, you learn to get better with time, and don’t make the same mistake twice.

  30. Anthony Little

    Begin a husband myself there are many of the rules in your article that I truly can agree and fully understand. I enjoyed reading every rule from 1-17. It also refreshes the mind on several areas of my marriage. Thanks for great article and it always a pleasure reading your articles.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thank you my friend Anthony. I try keeping it real. Us guys have to sometime walk on egg shells just to keep the peace. Yes as men Anthony, we do ‘screw up,’ but hell, you do agree we ain’t perfect! No matter which way we turn within our relationships, we always seem to end up in the ‘doghouse.’

  31. HI there,

    Great article, I loved the reading!

    It seems that you know women well and that’s great! I have a great relationship with my husband, but it’s not always easy. Sometimes he behaves like he doesn’t know how to treat a woman 🙂 But when this happens, I right away put him back on the right track. Anyway, I have bookmarked your article so I can show to my husband later on.

    Thank you for this excellent post!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hey Daniella, being in an household of women (wife & 3 grown daughters), I sometimes hear what my daughters go through in regards to relationships. I started to think that as men we must ‘walk on eggshells’ and behave in a certain way to please the opposite sex. Yes Daniella, show your husband this article. Let him know, he has to ‘get it together’ in order to keep peace in the household. Been there, Done that! 

  32. Oh man, I love your points. I think as men, we tend to forget how women work sometimes. Their emotions fluctuate like crazy so we really need to be patient with it. And listening is huge. haha, I remember when I was dating a girl in high school I pretended like I was listening but wasn’t. Then I had a huge verbal bash for it later. I think these are good notes to have even if you know them because it’s easy to forget or overlook them at times. Will keep this in my radar and will look at more content in your website too. Thanks!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thanks Parmi for checking my site out. These steps are critical steps to follow (as far as our women is concerned). Keeping our asses out of the dog house is hard to do. Most of the time, as men, we just can’t seem to get our act together. Regardless of how hard we try, we end up ‘in the doghouse’. And like you stated Parmi, a women’s feelings are sometime all over the place, which make it more difficult for us guys to understand.

  33. Wow.. you sure understand a lot about women! Yes, everything you share here are indeed true. Even when sometimes my partner telling me how beautiful another woman is, I don’t show my negative feeling. Rather I just responded with a nod. In fact I was so displease that I don’t know how to respond. Thanks for sharing. I will definitely share with my partner too.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Over the years, being around a wife and daughters, you tend to learn a lot about women, how they think and act. Always eavesdropping, listening in on their conversations, over the years you tend to learn a lot. So I just compile all my knowledge and incorporate these things in my post. But as a guy, women sometime expect us to walk around on eggshells. One slip up, and in the doghouse we go!

  34. Hi Ron, thanks for an amusing and thought provoking post. You have really hit the nail on the head with those rules, obviously learned in the battlefield. Congratulations on 37 years of marriage, you have made it further than most.

    I have been separated for 8 years now, so maybe I should have followed your rules more closely. I’m faced with the extra challenges that are involved with ‘blended’ relationships now. When you meet someone who has kids from a previous marriage, and you have your kids there is a whole new set of problems, their ex, your ex, the kids getting on together etc.

    That sounds like it could be the subject of another post, there’s lots of people in that situation. Do you have any advice on that?

    Thanks for a great post.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Greg. Glad you liked my post. Thanks for the congrats. Unfortunately, that’s where it ended. (Wife died 7 days after our 37th anniversary, July 2015) I’ve been flying solo ever since. Sold my house in Chicago, to start a new life in California. Our family backgrounds are similar. (ex’s, step children, etc;) To answer your question as how to make it all work, it’s just a matter of treating all the kds the same. This is ‘key!’ Don’t show any differences among them.

      Everyone has their own personalities. Stay in constant communication with them, help them work out their problems, be a good listener and the best dad you could be. Thanks for checking in. Please share this post.

  35. Wow this is like the holy grail to a guy like me!!! 🙂

    I don’t really have a problem in getting relationships…it’s the failures within them that overwhelm me. Speaking from my own experience – I feel men often believe they know what their partner wants, and how they feel, when in reality…they are probably well off the mark! 

    I like your third point on learning to listen – 99.9% of men fail at this one without even realising it (I have time and time again!).

    Do you believe that simple gestures by men can strengthen a relationship more than overblown actions?

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Chris, thanks for checking in. (yes that ‘not listening’ one is a killer!) We as men, try do what we can to stay on the ‘straight & narrow,’ thinking we’re doing and saying what’s right to please our women. But most women display moods that are very ‘fickle’, their feelings change quicker than the whether. 

      To answer your question, women have us walking on eggshells seems like on a regular basis. Making simple gestures to rectify any situation is usually not enough. Serious talks with meaning, coupled with sincere action may justify a situation just enough to keep our asses out of the dog house. 

  36. You are totally right about this! Nailed it! My husband read it and he asked me to read this. I hope he can remember all of them! I can be sure I will be the happy wife, and we will have a happy life. I love your descriptions, so real and funny to read. I will forward to my guy friend who is currently dating, he needed this too! as a wife I try to be considerate and be communicative, but sometimes it’s just our emotion that play up. 

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thanks for checking in, Emily. As a guy, we do our best to please, but sometime we just don’t put our best foot forward. (You women have us dudes walking on eggshells.) Hopefully, your husband will take heed, before he ends up in the doghouse. Maybe he’ll remember most of them, then all will be fine and peaceful. Please share this with as many folks as you can who needs it.

  37. Hi Ron, 

    Thanks for this great and informative wake-up call article for men. LOL! I really enjoyed reading your article and will definitely shared this with my husband, so that he may have a guidelines to follow and might learn some good advice from this article and surely Ron, you hit the nail on the head.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Glenda, as men, we do need a ‘wake up call’ every so often and a course in ‘Life Behavior 101’ (Some may make it to graduation, some may not) LOL. But I know to stay out of you ladies dog house, we just have to get it together. But of course, women make mistakes as well. No ones perfect! We all just have to move along in life maintaining the best relationships possible, cuddle up to one another and manage some sense of life values. Please share with others.

  38. Sir Ronald Kennedy 🙂 you have complied this article with such authority, and possibly given the grand idea for the most comprehensive ebook filled with reality that men of this new age world are in dire need of. I have been writing and studying in this niche for a number of years now. Reviewed a number of book/systems and never such cool fact about staying on the good side of your girl like this… 

    Many humble Regards. WA Kiwiboy.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Kiwiboy. Thanks for checking in. As a guy, I try to present my content with as much authority as possible. Thanks for your praise of my work. When I wrote this, it was with the intention of providing knowledge that will keep dudes out of their ladie’s dog house. You women have us guys trying to stay on our best behavior, but most times it doesn’t work that way. Good luck on your writings regarding this topic and thanks again.

  39. Hello, that’s quite a list you have there. Each point is very well articulated and easily explained. I’ll be bookmarking your page I think I would find it helpful to read once a week. To keep my mind fresh on staying on her good side. Personally, I know pleading for mercy always works even if I believe I’m right I still beg.

     Thanks for the article,really informative.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Louis. Hey man, a little pleading for mercy is something a guy may want to consider if all else fell. LOL! But if you want to stay on the ‘straight and narrow’ just follow these guidelines. You’ll be sure to stay out of her dog house in the future.

  40. I had a good laugh reading this article. Surely we aren’t that bad. Ok, I can understand that we do get upset when you guys side with our mothers or fail to notice a new hairdo, or even fail to listen to our endless chatter. But having friends of the same sex to me is fine, and taking your wedding ring off to go to the gym is also fine. In fact, I hate wearing rings, so wear it as little as possible. I also understand about coming home with the wrong groceries, as he doesn’t normally know what he is eating anyway.

    I think in general a relationship takes work both sides, and you also have to get to know each other inside out. This takes years and gets better with time.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      I know all ladies aren’t that bad, Michel…but I feel most are. (maybe you are of ‘rare breed’.) Some women just get a kick out of giving their man a hard time. The things you mentioned that you’d let your man get away with is something most women wouldn’t put up with. (again, a rare breed). Yes, it takes two to tango!

  41. I read from start to finish with a huge grin on my face. Luckily I am familiar with all 17 though I cannot say,with hand on heart, that I have adhered to all of them. I have indeed spent a few cold and frosty nights in the doghouse. With age comes wisdom, as some say. Retreat is always the better part of valour. I think it’s 23 years this July, I will however check, else I will fall victim to another of the rules. Thank you for an entertaining time.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thanks Twack for checking in. Yes, for sure. Men all gotta walk the ‘straight and narrow’ if they wanna stay out of their woman’s doghouse. As a man myself, back in the day, I made frequent appearances in the doghouse. Seems like no matter what we do; we as men, just can’t seem to please our ladies. Women are strange creatures. Sometimes we can’t live with them, can’t live without them.

  42. Hello Ron, 

    First I want to thank you for your very good and accurate advice if we want to have a good relationship with the opposite sex (women). I will tell you in my case after 25 years of marriage with my wife and two daughters women I have had many fights and many times I had to fall back. 

    The women when they come together are pure dynamite, their words can leave you very badly hurt. 

    They love to get together, which does not happen with men, I’m always at a disadvantage numerically I’m a loser before them.

    I miss my father a lot many years ago, with him we often put the henhouse in order 🙂 Thank you for the truth that you reflect. 

    Regards! Claudio

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Wow! My friend Claudio, the way you describe things within your household, it appears you were ‘gang tackled’ when it came down to situations that require debate. (All women in the family! Brother, you don’t stand a chance.) Been there. Done that! I went through the same thing.You lose the battle even before the war begins!

  43. Wow…. This is a revelatory information.

    I love the way you professional compiled this piece. It is very comprehensive and understanding. To be frank, seeing the good of your woman is the best one can ever think of, women are so complicated in dealing with. So one just has to be careful in other to always stay on their good side. Thanks for this piece of advice, It is very helpful..

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hey Michael,I agree with you 100% when you stated “women are so complicated.” It seems, as men dealing with women, we can’t live with them, can’t live without them. Beautiful creatures that sometime can be very complicated. Seems like no matter what we do, we always end up in the dog house at one point or another.

  44. Great Content and InformationThanks for this concise and thorough review. This is a must for all intending couples to read. Love is life and we must play it safe.

    I have really learned from your post. The rule that caught my attention the most and got me meditating on is

    “RULE #1 –Never forget – even her feelings have feelings”. This is an eye opener for me which I will start implementing as from today.

    Thanks for sharing this Great and insightful article

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thank you for reading my friend. Sometime, staying out of the doghouse could be a daunting task for us dudes. It seems no matter how hard we try, how hard we try staying on point, how hard we try understanding, we still wind up in that inevitable place we know all too well as ‘the dog house.’

  45. This is a concise and thorough article; and it is a must everyone into relationships to read and digest. Your article made me remember while I was into courtship, we love each other so much to the extent that I observed almost all the 17 rules you listed in your article and I am still playing around the rules even after 10 years of marriage.

    Thanks for the eye opener 

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hello my friend, welcome back. I’m glad you enjoyed my article. Hey, to keep us out of their doghouse, us as men have to walk on ‘eggshells,’ to keep the peace. Wealthfather, hard as we may try to honor these rules, sometime it’s not enough. We just have to accept the verbal abuse from our mate, grab our blanket and head directly to the doghouse.

  46. Thanks for writing out this lovely article and I must say its a must for every man to read and digest. This article really got me, but I must confess of been guilty with my reaction. Woman are so special and deserve to be treated right. I love the rule 16, never side with your mum over her.I must start practicing this rules to enjoy peace with my partner. Thanks for the insight. Best regards 

    • Ronald Kennedy

      These rules, right out of the starting gate, should be shared by many. Many men, who has tried to be slick and tried to get around these rules made a terrible mistake. If anything, your woman is gonna keep you in the doghouse longer even. They say ‘rules are made to be broken.’ But as far as a woman is concerned, these are cast in stone and nowhere near about to be changed. Please share with others. 

  47. Women are pretty complicated. They are like a textbook that needs to be studied on a regular basis. To understand and peacefully live with them would take a lot of work. For those people that have been able to stay in a relationship or marriage for a very long time should really be applauded because it is not as it seems from the outside. 

    A lot of work is usually put into these commitments for them to last for a very long time. The saying happy wife happy life is very true. If your wife is not happy then you can just forget about having a happy life.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Jay, you started your comment off with the exact description of women. ‘Complicated’ is right! You just can’t understand them. Communication can sometimes be impossible. Frustration within yourself is the next thing that usually sets in. But like any couple’s relationship, compromising makes things run much smoothly and will keep a man’s ass out of the doghouse.

  48. Jannatul Ferdaus

    I read  your article very carefully,thank you for the brilliant and lovely article about rules of stay on a good side. I think to remain the object of someone’s favor, to do something that causes someone to be pleased. As it is harmony and filled with a lot of golden wisdom. I agree with you and this is very helpful information. All the points you write, make sense but not all are relevant. Really thank you for sharing this post.                                       

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thank you my friend for checking in with me. I’m glad you enjoyed my article. I guess you could say that ‘all rules are made to be broken.’ Peace and harmony is what’s required to maintain a healthy relationship among couples. Anything less is irrelevant. Most men have to walk a straight line to keep themselves out of the dog house. But with plenty of begging, all things usually work out. Please share my post with others.

  49. This is nothing short of gold. I commend you for sharing this informative post from the depth of your knowledge and experience. I guess this is the masterpiece from 37years of marriage. My wife and I do have issues which I think is perfectly normal between couples but it always occur to me that she is just always on the lookout to find troubles with me. There was a time she changed her hairstyle from black to blonde. I had actually thought she was on a wig until she took it personally that I failed to notice she had changed her hair color..😄

    In truth, I appreciate your advice as highlighted in the post. Thanks

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Uh,oh Ro, I’m sure you violated one of the rules by not acknowledging her hair color change (…and lived to talk about it) LOL! Never forget my friend, that women are strange creatures of habit. As men, we can’t live with them and can’t live without them. You’re right about a woman waiting for their man to slip up. Just be careful…the doghouse is waiting!! Please share this with your downline. 

  50. Hahaaa.. This article is so funny but yet very informative and educative, and from what I see, this is definitely from experience.

    You must have really mastered the logics of women to stay married for over 37 years now. Congrats on that.

    I look forward to spending more of such years with my husband, so right now I will be handing this article over to him, so he memorizes it all, to stay in my good books. lol

    Thanks for sharing this.. 

    • Ronald Kennedy

      You know Queen, the doghouse can be a cold and lonely place. (Been there, Done that). Through humor, I always make my articles entertaining and enjoyable, yet instilling a realistic concept regarding today’s society. To keep the peace, we as men should carefully follow these guidelines With Caution!! Please share this article with others.

  51. Hi Dear!!! This article sure made me laugh! I think must that in our world most of families women to be the main person of our family. I am really such in instances–talk about having more feelings! Me totally believe that a person needs his own Freedom , but if he does not his own thing most of the time. I believe that if a person is happy with his life, he should simply move on and enjoy with your wife life, about a person wife and being for the rest of his wife life.
    Thank you Dear.

  52. Hahaa… I love your definition of this dog house, it most certainly a place no one should ever want to be.. Thank God am not a guy.lol

    Wow! 37 years of married life! I must commend you for that and I hope I get to live through so many years in matrimony. 

    This article really shows how far you’ve come and I bet you wrote from experience., so it’s definitely something every guy should take consider.

    I will make sure to pass this unto my brothers as I believe they will benefit a lot from it.

    Thanks 

  53. I swear I almost lost it when you mentioned the having friends that look like Tyson bet LOL. And the whole wearing kid shirts (in the starting the band tip lol) was wicked funny too. 

    And after three-decades of marriage, my hat goes off to you because these days a lot of people can’t seem to go the distance for some reason or another. Hopefully they find this post and implement some of these lighthearted tips.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thank you Nate my friend for reading and enjoying my post. If all goes well by us guys and we abide by all the rules, then maybe that may keep us out of that lonely place called ‘the doghouse.’ But as men, we tend to slip up even if we don’t mean to. That’s just the way we are. but with tons of practice, we’ll get better! lol. Please share this article with others.

  54. Kevin And Jade

    Oy! As Fran Fine would say.

    This post made me laugh out loud – especially the bit where “even her feelings have feelings”. I have to say I agree with that statement. Actually, I agree with most of the rules (not all but many) and want to congratulate you on over 3 decades of marriage.

    What an achievement! We’ll be celebrating our 5th year anniversary sometime this year and we might commemorate it by doing something silly and outrageous, like running away to Gretna Green. lol

    Maybe we have a shot at transforming our sitcom into something slightly more dramatic…maybe Outlander? lol We do live in Scotland, after all. Hah!

    Thanks for the post. I love it!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Kevin and Jade, let me aplaude you guys for five years of marriage. You all are a ‘match made in heaven.’ Congrats. I was headed into long staying power in my marriage, (The years were accumulating) until my wife passed away. But I continued to move forward with my life. As they say, “Life goes on.” Yes you guys should do something crazy on that day. Just don’t go running down the streets of Scotland ‘streaking,’ Y’all may get arrested. LOL! Please share my post with others!

  55. Dear Roland,
    Thanks for the brilliant and lovely article. I love this article. All the rules that you had told are fully true. Now I think that I take its printed copy and give it to my friends and family to read it. Because it would help them to know the rules. It’s good advice to the man. This post is naturally interesting to everyone and many of them are interested to maintain these rules to their woman because it’s a love-related post and often are attracted to this subject.
    Thank you for your valuable advice. Keep up the great work.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi my friend. It’s Ronald. I’m glad you liked my post. Thanks for reading. I guess you’ve heard the saying, “rules are made to be broken.” Problem is, if a dude break any of these rules and he got a crazy-ass woman, he’ll end up with a broken neck living in the ‘doghouse.’lol. We as men, ain’t perfect, but we try to do our best to walk the ‘straight & narrow’. But sometime our best ain’t good enough! Please share my post with friends.

  56. You know I can actually say your posts are satirical. They make humour of things that are real. These facts are just too true. Staying away from the dog house is really hard and one might be needing to go out of his way. Its not easy because the ladies are always hard and they keep on demanding. My girlfriend likes talking and if I don’t listen then I’m done for. She wants me to notice everything she does. Well, I guess we don’t have a choice. We want to enjoy out relationship? Then we have to stick to what they want.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Reality must be faced high, in my opinion, on a fun-filled scale. The ‘dog-house’ is real (But not too much fun!) Guys, we know around our women, we must walk on eggshells. We try keeping the piece, but still manage to screw something up. Hell, all we can do is try our best to be obedient and beg for sex. Please share my post!

  57. Success Business Online

    This is an interesting write out on how to smooth in a relationship and maintain peace.

    As a girl aka woman, I feel that there is many truth this is write out .

    In this interesting and humorous 17 rules, it pretty much sum up to what woman actually wants.  

    Ironically, most women want it all or nothing.  Though women can really be very difficult to win over, whoever the enlightened one will reap more benefits than all the hard work he puts in.

    Deep and real relationship helps a man to grow by leap by bounds, if only any man can see it.

    Thank you for this wonderful post. 

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi and thank you for posting your comment. Really appreciate it. You as a woman, probably think these rules hold firm. But as a man, I know rules are ‘made to be broken.’ (All men would say that, especially THESE rules). Men seem to be walking on eggshells lately, trying their best to please their woman. Some succeed, but most fail. Oh, well. My friend, do me a favor, please let me know if your receive this reply by sending me an ‘OK’ from your dashboard back office comment section. Thanks much. 

       

  58. kiara_mypilatescollective

    Thanks for the awesome article Ron, I can imagine ladies all around the globe nodding and clapping in synchrony as they read this! You hit the nails right on the head here!

    I totally agree with Arta’s comment below… I think I too will have to print these perfect instructions for my partner and leave them all around the house so he can learn (and learn fast) haha 🙂 

    The one line that had me laughing out loud “say goodbye to all lady friends who have more than one facial tattoo and less than three chins.” lol this is so true!!

    Great article Ron, keep up the terrific writing.

    Kiara

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Kiara, don’t be too hard on your guy at home now. (Us men do slip up every now and then). Hell! We damn sure do not wanna end up in you ladies doghouse. Seems like we make one visit there, then Bingo; we tend to have our asses right back again. (With you women, we have to walk on eggshells). LOL. Please pass this article on.

  59. These are some sound advice here and I agree with most of them. I think not referring her body to a fruit is a great idea, that’s a one way ticket to getting into the dog box. I love my girlfriend for who she is, not what she looks like and I tell her she’s beautiful everyday. Even if she’s a little chubby, she’s still perfect and I make sure to tell her that. Build up their self esteem and make them feel good about themselves, they will shower you with unconditional love. Well that’s what I’ve found to be true so far, lol.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Yes Brandon, you make a good point as to one way of staying out of the doghouse. Give a woman plenty of love and affection, and you can guarantee yourself less time in the doghouse. But be careful, you may screw up in other areas of your relationship which will for sure, land your ass right back in the doghouse. Thanks for reading.

  60. Not only is this article amusing and well written but it has some great tips as well!! 

    I have actually gone against the grain with some of these and been sent to the doghouse. I used to take requests as what they sounded like but soon learnt that they were not really requests at all but more like orders!

    Still, I wouldn’t change it for the world.

    Thanks for this informative and amusing post

    Tony

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Tony, thanks for reading my post. We as men, who tries to do right, always end up in the doghouse no matter what we do. Women just don’t understand. Now we all know, women aren’t perfect either by any stretch of the imagination. But they seem to hold one thing over our heads, they know we men can’t do without (I think you know what that is!) We have to keep it together!

        

  61. Haha! The 4th rule on having girlfriend that look like Mike Tyson is just Hilarious!! But  I agree. I need to be hottest looking of all her girlfriends. And the rule on keeping their head down should be observed by all means. There is nothing annoying as a man you are with staring at another woman even for a split second. These are important rules and must rules to be followed. Thanks for reminding the guys on these. Looking forward to more content from you. Great article!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi my friend Carol. Thanks for checking in with me. As you know, all rules are made to be broken! None are cast in stone! But I know, we as men, must obey by the rules, if we know what’s good for us. (The doghouse awaits us!) We know it’s a cold, dark and scary place. It’s a place one is banned to the cold shoulder, the evil eye, and the itchy couch. Please share this post with others.

  62. Wow! You cannot be more spot on with this post than what you have written here and I love every bit of reading on here. Wow! Simply awesome to see. It is inevitable for us all as guys not to find ourselves in the dog house when it comes to our partners. However, with this guide, the chances of that happening to us is very much more limited well. This is very great and I fancy this a lot. I’d share with my guys too

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi my friend. I’m happy you enjoyed my post. Like you commented, every guy should abide by these rules to keep their asses out of the doghouse. Rodarrick, you know as men, when walk around normally on ‘eggshells’ on a regular basis. We always have to be aware of what we say or do. Trying to please your woman at home can really be task. But hell! What can we do but obey? Please share this post with as many singles & couples as possible.

  63. I must strongly agree with you that being in a relationship sometimes is always hell for we guys and it’s a kind of situation that whatever you do. still bounce back to that faulty side and you’re confined to fixing someone’s feelings, you keep her heart so dearly more than you keep yours. Anyways, I’ve been reading through articles today, but this is the best I’ve been able to to read, it is very useful and will be of help even to those of us that are married. Thanks.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      It’s really amazing to me how we can easily end up in the doghouse; even for the smallest things. We’re only human and can’t be expected to do everything right. We try to be sweet and loving providers for our women, but sometimes it’s never enough. One slip up and BOOM!!…..Doghouse! Here we come! Please share this with others.

  64. Women are such complex beings. Living in harmony with a woman takes a lot of work and understanding and admitting you are guilty even when you are not or apologizing even when you are right. If you intend to be in a happy relationship with a woman then you need to be ready to do all you can to make her happy because when she is happy that is when you can also be happy. Seems strange but that is just the way it is.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Manuel, I couldn’t agree with you more! These beautiful ladies out here can turn out to be funny, complex creatures. We love them to death, but as they say, “You can’t live with them, and you can’t live without them!” So as men, to keep the peace, we must continue walking on ‘eggshells’ until the cows come home! LOL.

  65. This is really interesting and very factual, very realistic and practical, it is what most and every experience in relationships. These 20 tips are very useful and achievable with ease. It can get really frustrating to feel like a pet dog chained to the wheel to obey and please its owner but I believe by having understanding and patience, relationship will be made easy and that’s just what you have defined in here, I commend you for sharing it.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      It seems we men are expected to perform a certain way in regards to pleasing our mate; in the bedroom and outside of it. But the slightest slip and there we are….in the doghouse! It’s that cold lonely place that we don’t wanna be in. A place where we struggle to figure out what the hell we did wrong. May we’re in the Twilight Zone? Please share my post with others. 

  66. Hi,

    You have an interesting topic here. Women are wonderful creatures. I would say a woman feels the feeling of feelings. I don’t even know what that means. I think that is how it is with them. They are very sensitive. Little is a lot and a lot can  be little or nothing.

    The listening part is a serious issue. Even when I try to fake listening most times and just smile and hope the story will end soon, she just catch me in the process by asking about what she has been talking about and I have no clue. 

    Having friends who are girls could be fine for one and dangerous for another. We could go on and on on how to stay on her good side. I really like the way you have outlined this here. Thanks for sharing.

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Thanks for stopping by and reading my post. I clearly understand ‘rules are made to be broken’, but if we break any of these rules, we’re most likely to get our asses whupped…..then get thrown in the dog house. Sometimes we have to dance around issues on eggshells, hoping things will work out, even if we don’t know what the hell we done.

  67. Thanks so much for the outstanding article! I have to admit when I first ran across it I thought this would be one of those cheesy lists but these tips are great!

    I chuckled quite a few times reading through them but honestly they are all 100% right on, though probably not typically discussed. I especially agree with tip #20: no good comes out of a man (or a woman for that matter) taking off their wedding ring. I also love your mention of furry soulmates. Thanks again!

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Hi Shan. Thank you for reading. You always hear the saying that ‘rules are made to be broken.’ We guys slip up every now and then, and I don’t have to tell you were that leads us. No matter how much we plead, beg or lie (smile), we end up in the dog house until further notice. But we try our best to follow the rules. (Or give it a good shot anyway)

  68. Keeping the peace is always a smart idea – in romatic relationships and otherwise. It’s usually easy if you approach your relationships with an attitude of mutual respect and keep communication open. Take time to listen to your partner and also take note of unspoken cues and signals that your partner may be sharing. No one wants the peace to be disturbed in their relationship — listen and talk and you can usually find the best way back to a harmonious place. 

    • Ronald Kennedy

      Aly, communication and understanding are two main elements missing from enjoying a satisfying and happy relationship. (Not enough of that going around now-a-days). When a lot of miscommunication is flying around among both parties, it seems somebody always end up in the doghouse (usually the guy!) Please share this post with others.

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