Publish Date: June 6, 2021
The Pre-Date Phone Call
Make That First Move.
Making that first call can be scary. But someone has to do it! So why not let that someone be you? Don’t play games! How to handle the pre-date phone call is the first step! If you took somebody’s number and said you were going to call them, then do it. Call them!
Everyone agrees that playing that game stinks. In addition, don’t wait a week just to show you aren’t desperate. Two to three days is the optimal time frame to wait before calling someone.
But women really love it when the guy calls the very next day. It’s flattering and shows that he really is interested and is secure enough to not have to play games.
If you’re really not planning on calling that person, don’t take the number just to be nice.
How to handle the pre-date phone call is something you should organize in your mind, before even picking up the cell. You wait to long, your nerves will start to kick in, then you’ll wondering, “if this is the right person for me?”
Not calling is rude and that person deserves honesty, rather than waiting by the phone for a call you know isn’t coming.
The Initial Call
- When you get someone on the phone, be honest with them as to why you are calling. Don’t lead them on! If it’s their friend you are interested in, tell them. Or if it’s a connection in your company that you want, tell them. Don’t make a date if you’re really not interested. Try to be as honest with them as you can. Don’t say you’re busy if you’re not. If you don’t want to get together, then tell them that you don’t. It’s better to hurt someone in the beginning than to lead them on.
- If the person isn’t home, leave a message on their cell. Don’t just hang up before the voice message ends, like an idiot. You know all cell phones have caller ID. They will eventually see it, know it’s you and figured you just ‘wimped out!’ Leave a short, brief message. Don’t get cutesy on the phone and ‘blow it’ for your ass. Just leave something simple and direct. If she’s really interested, she’ll see your number in her caller ID and call u back.
- Don’t make your initial call to her when she’s at work, unless she tells you in advance it’s ok. Many employers don’t allow employees to chat on line or do personal calling during work hours. This could create tension between their employer and your ass with her for calling at the wrong time.
- If the first call isn’t returned, you can leave a maximum of one message two to three days later. That gives them a little leeway if they were swamped at work or out of town. After that, don’t call anymore! Don’t be in denial. This person probably isn’t going to call you and most likely is NOT interested. Don’t keep calling – they’ll think you’re a stalker.
- Be mindful of the time. Not everyone stays up to watch “Stupid Pet Tricks” on the old Letterman show some years back. (I still remember his show. He’s retired now.) About 10pm. Is the latest to call someone, and don’t call any earlier than 9am on weekdays and 10am on weekends.
- Make sure you are in a good frame of mind to call someone. Don’t call someone while you’re trying to read emails or come across a tax audit notice in the regular mail delivery & get pissed off.
Just remember my friend. Getting that person on the phone is only half the battle. Now that you’ve got their ear, what the heck do you do? What do you talk about? Really that’s up to you. (Just relax and don’t fire off a bunch of questions.) But most importantly, don’t keep someone on the phone too long! You don’t have to let them know about you whole life story before the date even starts! (Hell! That’s what the damn date is for!)