Currently Updated: April 12, 2022
Transform your Struggles into Strengths – Find Joy & Fulfillment!
“Balancing a career, family and our physical and emotional health can be exhausting. Getting help with it all brings relief.”
Couples that long to have a close, loving relationship, will try to make things work. But no relationship is perfect! One or the other person ain’t happy.
How to deal with depression in a relationship is an issue that has to eventually be dealt with. Every marriage or relationship between men and women or their partner will encounter issues at one time or another.
It’s crucial for you to understand how to deal with depression and suffering along with the burdens of stress, uncertainty, and pain.
Is It Possible For a Relationship To Cause Depression?
Sometimes, the relationship itself triggers someone’s depression.
However, people can also experience depression even if their relationship is a happy one.
People may use the term ‘relationship depression’ to describe depression that develops due to relationship difficulties. Studies have shown that folks can also experience depression even if their relationship is going ok and they feel happy.
Really depression could also be classified as phobia. During depressive phases, many people suffer from anxiety about the future, panic attacks, fear of failure, or rejection.
How To Deal With Sadness In a Relationship?
While every person’s experience with depression is unique, here are a few things you can do to help your loved one and yourself.
- Educate Yourself. A great way to support your loved one is to learn everything you need to know about depression, including it’s causes, symptoms and treatments.
- Separate Fact From Fiction. There are many myths about depression. For example, depression is not simply the result of laziness or weakness. Your partners pain may not “just be in your head.” Depression doesn’t need a reason.
- Remember to Take Care of Yourself. It can be very stressful coping with another person’s depression. It’s ok to take some time out for yourself. Self-care is NOT selfish!
- Get Support. Therapists, counselors, and support groups are not only for people with depression. Seeking professional help for yourself can help you feel supported, vent your frustrations, and make you more aware of your own emotional needs.
- Be There for Them. One of the most important things you can do for someone who is depressed is simply to be there for them and verbalize your support. Hold them close or just listen while they share their feelings.
- Don’t Take it Personally. Depression can make people behave in ways that they normally wouldn’t when they are feeling well. They may become angry, irritable, or withdrawn.
- Help Out Around the House. Just like when a person has any other illness, they may simply not feel well enough to take care of paying the bills or cleaning the house.
- Treatment is Important. You can help your loved one by helping them keep up with taking their medication and remembering appointments.
7 Steps To Help Your Relationship During a Depression Period
These sure-fire procedures will make for a more ‘smoother ride’
Step 1: TALK ABOUT WHAT’S HAPPENING
When facing hard times, many husbands and wives tend to withdraw from each other rather than seeking support and solace from each other.
Husbands, especially, may fall silent and “hunker down” alone.
This reaction is understandable in some respects: you may feel so overwhelmed during a crises that you try to conserve your emotional energy as you deal with the situation.
Also, many emotions are difficult to express at such times, such as when coping and suffering with job loss or the illness of a family member.
A better approach: keep talking about the situation you face. Share your frustrations, anguish, and worries. Strategize and plan together on how to solve the problems in your mind.
An ongoing conversation about your crisis won’t be easy or fun – in fact, you may find it emotionally wrenching – but taking this route is far better for both of you.
Step 2: STAY ON THE TEAM
This steps build on Step 1. If you can keep your communication channels open, you have a better chance of staying together together as you face the crisis. By doing so, you gain two great advantages.
First, you give yourself a better chance to strategize about the situation and plan your responses. You’re far stronger as a team than each of you would be on your own. You’ll come up with more (and better) ideas about how no proceed.
You’ll also present a united, more persuasive “front” when dealing with the world (such as in coping with doctors, lawyers, institutions, or whomever else you have to face).
Crises of every sort are stressful, and stress often serves as a wedge between the spouses. The divorce rate for couples following the death of a child, for instance, is high.
Working hard to stay in touch with each other -through verbal communications and emotional support-is crucial and will pay off in the long run. I urge you to do whatever you can to maintain a sense of mutual emotional support.
Sign#3: AVOID VENTING PAIN AND ANGER AGAINST EACH OTHER
It’s common that when facing a crisis, husbands and wives will vent their frustrations against each other as a “safety valve.”
If you have a sick child, for example, you’re more likely to express your anguish against your spouse rather than against the doctors and nurses at the hospital.
This is understandable but still problematic. Still, I strongly urge you both not to use each other as scapegoats during a stressful time.
Talking over the situation honestly and openly will help you avoid resorting to demoralizing martial warfare.
What should you do if your spouse vents his or her anger against you anyway? As a gentleman, you try to understand and learn how to stay on her good side.
That depends on the specifics of what’s happening. Physical abuse is unacceptable under all circumstances. If you feel you’re in danger of spousal abuse.
Don’t put yourself in danger. If, on the other hand, the abuse is verbal, you face a more complex situation.
Verbal abuse, too, is unacceptable, but it may be more understandable during an acute crises.
My recommendation is, again, to find external support-a pastoral counselor or a psychotherapist-who can help you and your spouse deal with this stressful situation.
Step#4: GIVE EACH OTHER TIME ALONE
How to stay on her good side is something you’ve been practicing for years. Just as you should try to provide support to your spouse, you need to know when to back off.
Crises are often so depleting that each member of a couple will need a chance to recuperate from the physical and emotional demands of coping.
Yes, communicating and standing together is important. But so is having time alone. Almost everyone needs a measure of solitude to rest, reflect on the situation, and generally “recharge.”
This is especially true if you’re facing a protracted crisis, such as a family member’s illness, recovery from an accident, or rehabilitation from an addiction.
My recommendation: don’t be offended if your spouse needs to pull back now and then and seek solitude. It’s part of the normal human coping mechanism.
Grant yourself this same opportunity. Each of you-and your marriage as a whole-will benefit.
Step#5: KNOW WHEN YOU CAN FIX THINGS
Knowing when you can fix things and when you can’t! I’m all for pushing hard when doing so will make a difference.
There will be times, however, when you can’t solve the problem facing you. There are times when you can’t make everything better.
If your spouse’s mother dies, for instance, you can’t undo the death.
You can’t even take away the burden of grief that your spouse is feeling. You just can’t fix the situation.
What you should do at such times? First and foremost, you need to accept that there are some events in life that are beyond our control.
Some problems are too big for us to fix. We’re only human. If you can accept the limits that are part of being human, you’ll take off some of the pressure you’ll feel otherwise. The result is-perhaps oddly-liberating.
Once you accept your inability to solve the problem, you’re free to do more fully what is within your power as a husband or as a wife; to offer your spouse love and support.
Step#6: GET HELP
One of the most common mistakes that couples make during a crises is to try to deal with the situation on their own. I regard this approach as unfortunate for several reasons.
First of all, many issues are too complex to resolve alone. Second, flying solo risks increasing the stress you feel, which can lead to psychological problems such as depression and anxiety, or even to physical health problems.
Third, it’s just not necessary to carry these burdens on your own shoulders. A wealth of resources is available for almost any health – or mental health-related challenge you may be facing.
For instance, almost every major illness in existence-from Alzheimer’s disease to Zollinger-Ellison syndrome-has prompted someone to set up a foundation, research center, or support group to help people deal with it.
Step#7: BE STRONG FOR EACH OTHER
Finally, regardless of sexual preference, I urge you to stay loyal to each other and see each other through the crises.
This is easier said than done, we know.
But in addition to offering so many other benefits, one of the extraordinary gifts that marriage provides is the possibility of offering a safe haven in the middle the storm.
If you and your spouse can stay steady with each other, you will be granting each other support and solace of a sort that almost nothing else in life can provide.
Does Depression Make You End Relationships?
Depression can have a devastating effect on close relationships.
Sometimes depressed people blame themselves for their pain, sometimes they blame their partners.
It’s baffling and shocking to see them turn into cold and blaming strangers. After years of affection and intimacy, how can they suddenly declare that they don’t feel love, even worse, that they have never loved their partners at all?
This isn’t something that just happens. Loyalty and supportiveness require active choice. I urge you to make that choice.
So what do you think? Did you enjoy this article? If so, please share it on your social media page.
See Below How We Can Help You Or Someone You May Know:
When you buy something from this website, I may receive an affiliate commission.
These are my opinions and are not representative of the companies that create these products.
My reviews are based on my personal experience and research. I never recommend poor quality products, or create false reviews to make sales.
It is my intention to explain products so you can make an informed decisions on which ones suit your needs best.
Back to Home Page