Love-Struck Men Wanting To Date Women In A Gentle Way.
I admit, that when it comes to men loving women, I’ve had a hard time meeting the ladies. Why? At the time, I had no idea! During my months of searching, one night I finally found someone (Or at least I thought!) Stunning. Just beautiful. Miss Universe! I was thinking to myself, “I’ve found that special someone I’ve been searching for all my life!”
I was just ecstatic! I was thinking, “Boy! I still got it.” Going through different women is exhausting. As men, we all go through rough times meeting the opposite sex (or in some cases, the same sex).
Anyway, I thought this was the best time of my life. No doubt about it! My sights were always focused on finding that special person who’d give me the thrill of a lifetime! But this was beyond my wildest dreams.
Long dark brown hair. Sexy exotic eyes. Nice ruby red lips. Magnificent body! Then just like that,…WHAM!! Alarm clock goes off. Time to go to work! (I gotta stop watching that damn porn before bedtime!)LOL.
I emerged from that deep dream state with a smile on my face. Shit felt so real!
Regardless, when it boils down to relationships, I always say no matter if it’s man and woman or same sex couple, it doesn’t matter! Love is Love…no matter how you look at it! There’s someone for everybody!
One of the biggest self-improvements that I’ve made in my life is finally selecting the right mate. The woman that would eventually become my wife!
Since I found the right woman and started building a relationship in regards to this growing process, I had to know to keep the peace within the home. Having now someone I’m compatible with eases all pain of loneliness, and replaces it with joy and happiness.
Trying to find folks ‘on the re-bound’ only means being with someone who can fill the void after they have being dumped! Sometimes hooking up way too quickly is not good!
Time must be taken out to know him or her. The only thing on your mind is being lonely again! But let’s face it, it’s more than just a lonely thing. You get a little horny as well! This is your brain on sexand really, at the moment, that’s all that’s important!
Careful consideration must be in order, when selecting that perfect mate. Certain expectations must be met. (Just don’t get too picky. No one’s perfect.
The process of finding someone who’s nice and maybe a little interesting, can become a big task but is very doable. Doable….and fun!!
Follow these guidelines: Don’t Rush In You know that when you get yourself in too deep fast, this level of involvement makes you panic when the fantasy lifts. You have to keep reminding yourself of how badly you react when relationships start to get real. Now-a-day, sex doesn’t matter. Same sex couples have the right to be in love to, just like anyone else..
You also need to think more about how your behavior is making the other person feel. Your breakneck pace sets up a whirlwind. If it doesn’t scare your love interest away, it’s so compelling, it can only provide the basis for an enormous fall. As a man, it’s always in your favor to try Staying on her good side.
Remember, there’s one very simple way out of this: SLOW DOWN. Take your time. Let the intimacy develop gradually. Think before you leap. Avoid breakneck courtships and start evaluating a relationship step by step as it’s developing.
Hopeful Couple Wondering If They Have A Future: You have to understand the weight of your words. Phrases such as “I’ve never met anyone like you before,” “I’m never this attracted to anyone,” and “I can’t wait for you to meet my sister – the two of you will really get along,” are incredibly seductive.
They evoke a feeling of specialty that encourages your partner to have high expectations as well as placing heavy pressure on you to come through with a commitment. Sure, romance is fun. But to many people romance means love, and love mean marriage. Watch your words. If you use words that convey caring and the promise of a future, the other person may respond accordingly.
Certain phrases can cause even a first date’s attitude toward you to change totally – sometimes from casual to “overboard” in a single evening. Don’t Misrepresent Your Romantic History Or Your Romantic Attitude Don’t make it sound as though your previous relationships ended because your ex-partners were somehow lacking.
It’s important that you accept responsibility for your participation and learn as much as you can from it. Blaming your execs can also deceive your new partner, Someone who likes you is going to want to accept what you say at face value. If you tell someone, “Your different,” he/she wants to believe you. If you say, “I want this relationship to be different,” or, “I think this relationship can be different,” he/she wants to share that hope.
Don’t convey attitudes without thinking about what you are saying. For example, if you mean “We don’t know each other well enough to have sex, “don’t say, “I would never go to bed with anyone unless I was certain the relationship is going to work out.” Otherwise the moment you go to bed, your partner is going to assume it means a long-term commitment. Keep in mind that at this stage you have no idea how the relationship will work out. You may want it to be different, but wanting is not enough.
Until you are totally sure, avoid implying anything that can confuse your partner about your past or your intentions for the present – or the future.
Don’t Knock Yourself Out Trying To Impress A Potential Partner When you pull out all the stops to make an impression, your actions are saying,
“This relationship is very important to me; I want to make it work.” That may be true right now, but how will you feel in six weeks or six months?
Today you are overwhelmingly interested; tomorrow you may just feel overwhelmed. Everyone has a different method of impressing dates. What are yours? Do you share the most intimate details of your life right away?
If you do, your partner can’t help but think you are already clear about your intentions for developing a very sharing and exclusive relationship. Do you spend excessively on restaurants, gifts, or trips? Do you cook wonderful meals or bring elegant gifts?
All of this makes it appear that you’re taking the relationship very seriously, and it puts a lot of pressure on you to keep delivering. The reality is that you can’t possibly be ready for something this serious this soon. Your behavior needs to reflect this fact. If you have a history of eventually being haunted by everything you gave in the beginning, it’s time to become comfortable with giving less.
No one, who’s interested in you is going to walk away because you didn’t tell them your deepest, darkest secrets during your first phone call or take them to Paris on your first date.
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Society has long dictated that in order to build a successful relationship, complete with understanding and trust, there should also be eventual commitment. Playing dating games in life should take a backseat, and let a more serious and settled love life rise to the forefront! Now-a-day, most folks entering into relationships have NO clue as to what these two words really mean:
TRUST & COMMITMENT
We know ‘trust & commitment’ go ‘hand-in-hand,’ but lets take the word ‘commitment!’ Just this one word alone will have most folks shaking in their boots and having second thoughts!
Some start regretting they even uttered that mere word! (Just a ‘slip-of-the-tongue, perhaps?)’ Whatever the reason, it’s now registered in that person’s memory bank!
Therefore, just thinking about giving up those exciting flings before taking the final plunge, gets you a little shaky and harboring second thoughts!
You want to keep on meeting those of the opposite sex and all the thrills that come along with it. But committing yourself to one man or woman can be a trying experience!
You also understand that sometime dating can be very awkward. Asking someone out could be nerve wrecking! So how can you tell if he or she is interested in you?
The anticipation of a long romantic affair with that special someone goes through your mind. The image you hold is long-term. You don’t even care about how much money they make or material things they possess, or his or her background (This goes to show how desperate you are!).
But finding your mate doesn’t have to be out of desperation. It’s just experiencing ‘that feeling’. This is a feeling that will make you shout, “I think I’ve found me a compatible mate”.
So you really think you’re ready to deal with the real world? See video…
I know many seeking true love doesn’t care about status. The type of occupation they have really doesn’t matter to you. They can be a computer geek repairing motherboards or replacing ram for laptops. Or they may work online, struggling to make a few bucks with a network marketing company.
Then again, maybe they just won’t work at all! (It makes them break out into a ‘cold sweat’ just thinking about going to job interviews. (This applies to either sex. They’re just ‘lazy ass’ people).
You know, ladies, some guys take great pride in being plain lazy. They are tired by the end of the day just from doing nothing!
Who wants some guy lying around the house all day smelly, drinking beer, eating fish & chips and playing video games on their Xbox?
You may really find yourself in that situation. After working two jobs, you come home one evening to discover this person with their feet up and playing video games.
But at least he did bathe earlier, so you’d have to give him that much credit! But or some reason, he still stink! But all in all, romance is in the air. (Mr. stinky wants a loving relationship too!) Romance is here, there – It’s everywhere! Even animals go into ‘heat’ and want to make a connection. Meow! Meow!
These are just a few of the things you think about. Things you may or may not have to deal with. Yet, before any preparations can be taken toward the ritual of marriage, the proper choice of a mate must take place. This is where you have to be careful!!
Now ladies and gentlemen, you sit down and question yourself. You think; “How do I meet someone who’s worth the time and effort?” “Will I regret this in the long run?” “Will I get taken for a buggy ride?” “Would I have to protect my money by changing banks and my password?” “Should I get a Prenup agreement?”
Suppose one night you’re watching your favorite crime program, “America’s Most Wanted.” The woman or man you’ve been dating for the past three years suddenly appear on the show’s ’10 Most Wanted list.’ Now what do you do?
A) Jump on your cell phone and tell all your friends that your partner was on the tube.
B) Confront the person and let them know that you know about their past, secret life.
C) Get the hell out of there as fast as you can because they are wanted for double murder in three states.
Also, take a retrospective tour over past relationships. (you’ve found yourself doing a lot of that lately). Your mind starts to wonder;
“Were those encounters fruitless or rewarding? Or would my time had been better spent sitting home masturbating?
“Was the failure due to something I may have done, said or failed to do?” I don’t know.
“Was the relationship timely?” (Sometimes when we force the game to go in our favor, things never seem to turn out right).
Maybe different time sets played a role with you being a modern 21st century individual, dealing with the current things in life, and your potential soulmate stuck in the 60’s. (Trying to play catch-up)!
Recently, I ridiculously created and profiled personalities of the type of folks someone would encounter while out and about in their daily lives. The numerous singles who line our city streets and singles bars are targeted as well. I posted these funny profiles (Along with illustrations), on individual post! “Why did I do this, you ask?” The only reason I can think of is that I’m just a crazy ass, son-of-a-bitch! LOL!!
Oh,…and lets not forget those who have been deeply hurt and lied to most of their adult lives. Also, stay focused on the gold-digger’s and ‘lady hustlers’ coming out to stake their claim on some hapless soul.
The single person can work on and develop strategies now with ease! You may be walking down the street headed to a neighborhood store, to the mall, to pick up dog food, buy yourself some liquor or to any other area where there are people.
Say for example, you’re a guy and you spot a pretty woman in the area. Or maybe walking along the beach. Once noticing her, you’d spend a good amount of time thinking of what to say. It takes you awhile to get up the nerve to approach her because due to numerous past rejections, you haven’t been feeling too good about yourself.
Next, you would then start thinking of every excuse about what could go wrong. “She’s too gorgeous for me.”
I don’t stand a chance.” “Maybe that’s really not a woman. If she show interest in me, then I know something is up.”
Now remember, this scenario could easily been set for men or women. The biggest difference would’ve been a woman may not have been so aggressive (But they are out there!)
Now after using the tools here and following what’s offered to you, it’s full steam ahead!
You’ll walk with pride. Head held high. Radiate more confidence. Your game plan is well into place! You’re ready to go out into the world because this is the only way where folks find their special soul mate!
So guys & girls, don’t spend anymore weekend night’s alone staring at your cell phone waiting for a text message or wishing it would ring. Your friends will call wanting you to hang out with them, but you know it’s only because they need someone hold the camera and take the group photos. Or someone to sit, watch the purses & drinks while they dance.
Hell! You want a mate! A good male companion. Someone you can call a friend! (You know you have to become friends first before ‘lovers’).
Keep in mind that if you are seriously hunting for that special someone, then you need to know everything you can about your prey. Make your best shot count! Bag the best one you can!! Remember, with a well thought out plan of action, any man or woman can be yours.
First – As far as age goes, remember age ‘aint nothing but a number.’ You can still approach a sexy hot single regardless of what your age is. (of course, you don’t want to approach someone too young. Then you’ll come across as a ‘dirty ol’ man or woman.’)lol. Just use common sense.
I’m an older guy myself, but love to date younger women. Also, never let nationality get in the way. Lots of guys miss out on the possibility of scoring a winner thinking one-sided. (There are beautiful types of women in all races).
Second – People, understand that most folks love humor. They like a person that makes them laugh. You don’t have to be another Kevin Hart or Eddie Murphy, but if you feel that you want to joke around, go ahead and make them laugh. Just don’t be offensive!
I used this approach on a pretty girl I met while out buying dog and cat food. She was laughing at mostly everything I said, but unfortunately she was already in a relationship. (Hey…can’t win ’em all).
Third – Make conversation related to what ever you’re doing at the moment. Grocery shopping? Then ask her about the freshest fruit to buy, how to make a good salad or how high the store’s prices are. A woman out shopping makes eye contact. Then will ask a guy if he can reach something on a higher shelf for her. (it’s ok for the woman to be the aggressor sometime,) If you’re out walking your dog, you can meet many singles out doing the same as well. Be creative, friendly and smile a lot!
Fourth – Don’t be intimidated by a woman or guys outer beauty. (Inner beauty is what counts most). For example, guy’s think when they see a fine woman, she won’t speak or have time for them.
You’ll be surprised to find out that this woman is just as lonely as you. She realize her gorgeous looks are a ‘hinder’ instead of a ‘helper’ that is keeping guys at bay.
(I just gave a guy perspective because I’m a guy. But this touches both sexes).
Fifth – Just be yourself and have confidence. This is strongly recommended for the serious single guy, trying to get it together.
Try not to portray someone you’re not. You’ll go along ways just by being honest because you don’t want something later, to come back and bite you in the ass.
(REMEMBER: You never know what day, time or place that special someone may come along).
“How can I become more confident?” is the question most struggling, single people ask. Whether it’s about approaching women, dating them or just having sex.
For those still not confident enough, it all feels like a terrifyingly uncertain nightmare, and as a result, you worry about practically everything.
“What do I say?” “What do I do?” “Where do I take her?” “What if she doesn’t like me?” “What if she says no?”
“What if I’m not good at all?” “What if I throw up on her after too many shots?” What if, what if, what if….
Fortunately, in the last twenty years researchers have gained a lot of new insights into the origins and nature of confidence, and they allow us, finally, to explain exactly what it is:
Confidence is the realistic expectation you have of being successful at something, given (a) your competence at it and (b) the risk involved with doing it.
Take driving, for example. When you get behind the wheel now, as opposed to being a much younger inexperienced driver, you understand all the unseen risks and thus have a very high expectation of getting where you intend to go safe and sound.
Don’t think confidence is some kind of modern phenomenon through, just because people today don’t shut up about it. Confidence has been a thing for a long time.
In fact, confidence is part of your genetic makeup which evolved over thousands of generations as a mental tool to guide our decision-making.
A confident guy expects the woman to engage him in conversation when he goes up to say hi and introduce himself. He expects her to give him her number when he ask for it or to dance at the club.
He doesn’t think he deserves it or she owes it to him (unless he is also an entitled douche bag, which is entirely possible) – he just expects that he’s going to get it, even before he says a word. Why?
Because he’s done this dozens if not hundreds of times, with enough success to accurately predict the likely outcome. How can you realistically judge the likelihood of your success in a unique moment like that – or in any domain of life?
Your brain does it by unconsciously integrating a bunch of data from your memory and your current states. It adds up your past training, experiences, and successes, plus your present capabilities, to guide your decisions. Your brain is like a mushy three-pound sports book between your ears, setting the line and shifting the odds on to your immediate future.
The most annoying thing about confidence, though, is that 90% of the time it’s dormant (or at least, it should be). It should only become an issue when you’re actively facing a risky challenge, not when you’re eating dinner or sitting at home trying to chose between watching football or Netflix.
Nobody walks around all day vacillating between confident and un-confident. That would be exhausting and pointless. When a challenge does arise-like texting a new mate from eHarmony or having sex with a woman for the first time-your confidence system immediately switches on and delivers its verdict: what confidence level you should feel in this situation, given its rewards and risks in relation to your competence level.
For example, if your game is tight and you’ve had successful dates from eHarmony, your confidence is probably high. If you’ve had a history of striking out with women and a reputation as a two-pump chump with new ones, your confidence is going to be low.
So let’s talk about building confidence. (Remember, you’re never too old.) First thing’s first: there are No shortcuts! Anyone who tries to sell you their “Ten Tricks To Land A Foxy Lady“ is selling you bullshit!
If they tell you to visualize your mating success, then the actual secret is that they’re charlatans taking your money.
The only effective strategy for gaining real confidence is to develop skills and demonstrate performance of those skills.
Developing realistic self-confidence is all you need and it’s right within your mind! Start building up your confidence NOW! All you have to do is get good at the things you feel confident about and then demonstrate those skills, to yourself and others. “Go after what you want in confidence! Your compatible mate is out there waiting”
This means learning, practicing and then consistently performing under real-life conditions with real stakes, when people are watching. Once you do that, confidence and established skill-sets are almost automatic.
EVERYTHING STARTS WITH A SUCCESSFUL PLANNING PROCESS
When it comes to love and finding a mate for a long-term relationship, studies has shown that people need a clear set of instructions for specific actions.
I’ve outlined a five-step process which boils everything you need to do. Down to the simplest possible set of facts to learn,choices to make, and actions to take. The five steps are:
GET YOUR HEAD STRAIGHT: Fix your mental framework regarding sound relationships; replace antique nonsense with state-of-art insights; develop confidence, understand the opposite sex point of views, and clarify your mating ethics and mating goals.
DEVELOP ATTRACTIVE TRAITS: Understand what they want and why, and then give it to them by cultivating the key traits of physical health, mental health, intelligence, willpower, tenderness, and protectiveness.
DISPLAY ATTRACTIVE PROOFS: Understand the signaling principles that underlie honest, hard-to-fake proofs of value, and construct your personal, professional, social, and romantic life around building and displaying those proofs.
GO WHERE THE PEOPLE ARE: Understanding how the mating markets work, given the supply and demand of men and women; how to find that person who offer the highest value and the best compatibility, given your tastes and goals; and how to meet those people in specific places, from local leisure clubs to online dating apps.
TAKE ACTION: Understand how to talk. Date them, have great sex with them (When the time is right), and learn from your experiences toward building a positive feedback cycle of personal improvement, and a sound relationship. All of which will help you create and execute your mating plan.
These steps are simple to understand, but they’re not always easy to accomplish. Anyone who tells you otherwise is selling you bullshit!
So in conclusion, regardless if you’re a man or woman, you may not always come out on top every time playing dating games. Things have seriously changed within our world now, in regards to seeking love and relationships. In these difficult times we live in today, it’s very hard, as a single man or woman to meet ANYONE. (Not Easy In Today’s Times.) No one wants you in their face!
Picture yourself one afternoon relaxing alone on the beach, with a mask on, trying to yell at a pretty woman standing on the other side. You shout in a loud voice, “Hey pretty lady? You come here often!?” Muffled through a mask. (‘Good luck with that shit!’)LOL!
There are plenty of good people out here, but you can’t get to know them when you have to stay ‘isolated’ & ‘six feet’ apart.
DATING APP USAGE ON THE RISE
2020 is a year we will all never forget, starting with covid 19 in February! Also, look at all the marches that went on condemning racial injustice & police brutality in mid summer. Regardless of what part of the country you lived in, you saw some form of this going on.
It’s just Not enough LOVE in the world today! Just not only on a personal level, but global as well. 2020 will go down in the history books as ‘The Year Of ‘Pure Hell!’ Besides putting us in a bad economic and health crises, It also has ‘hindered’ our search for a compatible mate. (If you’re married, you can just ignore this section…unless you plan on cheating.) I’m targeting ONLY singles now! Currently, online dating is ‘HOT’ & increasing in popularity. During past years, this style of meeting people for dating or possibly marriage has taken a ‘bad hit.’ No one wanted to explore this route. But not anymore!
Research has shown that 38% of US adults, 30 to 49, have used an online dating service and even lower for 50 and older. and 16% have found a committed relationship from its use.
So if you are seriously searching for a mate who’s wanting the same thing as you, someone to fulfill that empty void in your life, regardless if you’re Christian or not; then here’s the best one I recommend. Check this out:
Ron’s Final Thought On The Reality Of Love
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